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psychiatrist Says- Can't Help
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 255545" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Stef, </p><p> </p><p>Hi. I think when Dude was little - I disagreed with "no more medications" logic. Apparently I wasn't alone because in an 11 year period our son was on more than 65 medications. Nothing really helped. Sometimes I thought it did. I was hopeful a bunch, but looking back? Either his system was not mature enough to benefit from the medications, or they were given to adults with results but not recommended for kids and we said to give them anyway (like Zoloft) which resulted in 2 attempted suicide attempts. </p><p> </p><p>Now that we're able to sit and talk to Dude a little more about his life and past - he would tell anyone "NO medications" and mean it. He keeps saying "I want to do this myself." I keep saying "Cars can't run without oil, what is the big deal if you need it and it helps?" </p><p> </p><p>Recently however after about 2 years of NOT taking medications of any kind he went to the doctor. With his current probation, not finding a job, having to look at possible 30 years in jail coming up in a trial, he called on his own and got set up with some Cymbalta. We made NO deal out of it whatsoever. I can't even tell you if he takes it or not. I hope so, he's very depressed since the death of his brother. But - again - I think he sees it as a weakness. </p><p> </p><p>I hoped for years that a pill would cure, then knew it was a joke, and they could only HELP .....IF - behavior modifications were in place. Without the kids' commitment to wanting to deal with his anger? Giving him a pill was like throwing a teaspoon of water on a bonfire. Eventually we figured he would get tired of HIMSELF.....and change. I think backing off and not making suggestions even though it kills me helped the most. If he asks for my advice? I'll help - other wise I'm trying to learn how to back off. </p><p> </p><p>I still, of course, tell him I love him and left the door open to help him in any way if he wanted to improve himself. He insists he just wants to do it by himself.....so for now - that's what he's doing, and Im' glad. If he didn't? How would he ever know that he would be able to or NOT able to? So far - he's able. Less work for me, and bigger sense of accomplishment for him. </p><p> </p><p>Hope something in this ramble helps </p><p>Star</p><p>I make no bones about the importance I place on a quality therapist - I think a good therapist is and can be much more important to a teen than a psychiatrist. It was for us anyway.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 255545, member: 4964"] Stef, Hi. I think when Dude was little - I disagreed with "no more medications" logic. Apparently I wasn't alone because in an 11 year period our son was on more than 65 medications. Nothing really helped. Sometimes I thought it did. I was hopeful a bunch, but looking back? Either his system was not mature enough to benefit from the medications, or they were given to adults with results but not recommended for kids and we said to give them anyway (like Zoloft) which resulted in 2 attempted suicide attempts. Now that we're able to sit and talk to Dude a little more about his life and past - he would tell anyone "NO medications" and mean it. He keeps saying "I want to do this myself." I keep saying "Cars can't run without oil, what is the big deal if you need it and it helps?" Recently however after about 2 years of NOT taking medications of any kind he went to the doctor. With his current probation, not finding a job, having to look at possible 30 years in jail coming up in a trial, he called on his own and got set up with some Cymbalta. We made NO deal out of it whatsoever. I can't even tell you if he takes it or not. I hope so, he's very depressed since the death of his brother. But - again - I think he sees it as a weakness. I hoped for years that a pill would cure, then knew it was a joke, and they could only HELP .....IF - behavior modifications were in place. Without the kids' commitment to wanting to deal with his anger? Giving him a pill was like throwing a teaspoon of water on a bonfire. Eventually we figured he would get tired of HIMSELF.....and change. I think backing off and not making suggestions even though it kills me helped the most. If he asks for my advice? I'll help - other wise I'm trying to learn how to back off. I still, of course, tell him I love him and left the door open to help him in any way if he wanted to improve himself. He insists he just wants to do it by himself.....so for now - that's what he's doing, and Im' glad. If he didn't? How would he ever know that he would be able to or NOT able to? So far - he's able. Less work for me, and bigger sense of accomplishment for him. Hope something in this ramble helps Star I make no bones about the importance I place on a quality therapist - I think a good therapist is and can be much more important to a teen than a psychiatrist. It was for us anyway. [/QUOTE]
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