Robinboots
New Member
Yesterday we had issues. Found out GFG17 was fired from his job, NOT transferring as he said. Just one more straw on the proverbial camel's back. When he got home, I stood up and very calmly said:
You will go to your room, right now. You will make your bed and clean up your cr*p.
husband took the car keys. difficult child planted himself and would.not.budge. I went nose-to-nose and starting walking. He moved.
Once in his room, I repeated what I'd told him. He refused. He tried to slam the door in my face, and I stuck my foot in it - had on my boots, easy peasy! He still refused.
I started picking up things, dropping most in the trash can. Started going through his drawers, same thing. Found some interesting items: SIM card, not his; couple knives.
Told him he had an appointment. with the psychiatrist at 8:30 in the morning. He said he wouldn't go.
This morning, I opened his door, told him to get up and ready, that we were leaving in a few minutes. No response. So I went, alone.
Here is what I learned today:
CD, or Auditory Processing Disorders (APD) - no real difference, has little to do with age - 18 being the arbitrary cut-off, much like voting age, drinking age, etc. The first is more of a phase, the second is more or less forever.
Some parts can be treated; some things the kid CAN help, DOES have control over. For instance, this morning, refusing to go - he was perfectly capable of getting his butt out of bed.
Some kids have to hit rock bottom - like an alcoholic - before you can start to build them back up. Some kids have to go waaaaaaaaaay down that road.
So, maybe this will help someone. I'm still torn. This sucks and is not easy - I can be tough, but then I remember something from when he was little or he does/says all the right things for a short time, and even if I don't cave, it tears me up inside to do what I have to.
I've also discovered some things that he's apparently been telling others. Last night he had a girlfriend totally freaking out by telling her he was scared, his dad was beating him, etc. She was wanting to call the police. Nice. She hasn't learned yet.
He's told others that an XGF killed herself; at least one friend has realized that he uses an alias online - in addition to his real self; they say they are afraid of him, that he's creepy and a liar - more descriptions such as compulsive and pathological. Even a paragraph on him telling everyone that he got busted with $100 worth of alcohol - presumably THEIR money, re a party. Says he graduated early from the military academy, the one from which he was expelled. Says his uncle is a US Marshall and so he can get away with things. On and on.....
You will go to your room, right now. You will make your bed and clean up your cr*p.
husband took the car keys. difficult child planted himself and would.not.budge. I went nose-to-nose and starting walking. He moved.
Once in his room, I repeated what I'd told him. He refused. He tried to slam the door in my face, and I stuck my foot in it - had on my boots, easy peasy! He still refused.
I started picking up things, dropping most in the trash can. Started going through his drawers, same thing. Found some interesting items: SIM card, not his; couple knives.
Told him he had an appointment. with the psychiatrist at 8:30 in the morning. He said he wouldn't go.
This morning, I opened his door, told him to get up and ready, that we were leaving in a few minutes. No response. So I went, alone.
Here is what I learned today:
CD, or Auditory Processing Disorders (APD) - no real difference, has little to do with age - 18 being the arbitrary cut-off, much like voting age, drinking age, etc. The first is more of a phase, the second is more or less forever.
Some parts can be treated; some things the kid CAN help, DOES have control over. For instance, this morning, refusing to go - he was perfectly capable of getting his butt out of bed.
Some kids have to hit rock bottom - like an alcoholic - before you can start to build them back up. Some kids have to go waaaaaaaaaay down that road.
So, maybe this will help someone. I'm still torn. This sucks and is not easy - I can be tough, but then I remember something from when he was little or he does/says all the right things for a short time, and even if I don't cave, it tears me up inside to do what I have to.
I've also discovered some things that he's apparently been telling others. Last night he had a girlfriend totally freaking out by telling her he was scared, his dad was beating him, etc. She was wanting to call the police. Nice. She hasn't learned yet.
He's told others that an XGF killed herself; at least one friend has realized that he uses an alias online - in addition to his real self; they say they are afraid of him, that he's creepy and a liar - more descriptions such as compulsive and pathological. Even a paragraph on him telling everyone that he got busted with $100 worth of alcohol - presumably THEIR money, re a party. Says he graduated early from the military academy, the one from which he was expelled. Says his uncle is a US Marshall and so he can get away with things. On and on.....
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