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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 244511" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Well, now after the initial <strong><em>wham</em></strong> of the situation has worn off, I'm back in full blown detachment mode. </p><p> </p><p>Janet, it actually helps that I don't have the room or the money to help them. Maybe if I did I'd be more tempted, though I'd like to think not. I got really burned bad the last time. And while I'm pretty darn good at forgiving, I <strong>never</strong> forget.</p><p> </p><p>At 40 and 29 you just somehow have got to be able to get your life together and priorities straight. </p><p> </p><p>K among other things, is now going to try for disability, for herself as well as Alex. She's working on the suggestions I passed on. </p><p> </p><p>I'll give her all the moral support she needs and offer advice when I can. But that's pretty much gonna be it. When she made mention of needing to ask to stay with us back when Kayla was a baby (in '99), I countered with several stories of equally desperate mothers here who had posted for help on freecycle, told her the job situation again. Clearly letting her know the situation here is no better than there.</p><p> </p><p>The thought of the grands being on the street churns my stomach. But bringing them here is not a solution. It would strap husband and I to the point we couldn't help at all becaue we'd probably go bankrupt again. Then we'd all be in the same boat.</p><p> </p><p>If I lived there.......she'd be in my car and I'd drive her where ever she needed to go for help. I'd help her fill out forms and call people. And in countless other ways. But we're just too far apart to be of any real help.</p><p> </p><p>I don't like it. It doesn't sit well with the way I was raised. But I can't do anything about it either. So I will just have to continue to detach.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 244511, member: 84"] Well, now after the initial [B][I]wham[/I][/B] of the situation has worn off, I'm back in full blown detachment mode. Janet, it actually helps that I don't have the room or the money to help them. Maybe if I did I'd be more tempted, though I'd like to think not. I got really burned bad the last time. And while I'm pretty darn good at forgiving, I [B]never[/B] forget. At 40 and 29 you just somehow have got to be able to get your life together and priorities straight. K among other things, is now going to try for disability, for herself as well as Alex. She's working on the suggestions I passed on. I'll give her all the moral support she needs and offer advice when I can. But that's pretty much gonna be it. When she made mention of needing to ask to stay with us back when Kayla was a baby (in '99), I countered with several stories of equally desperate mothers here who had posted for help on freecycle, told her the job situation again. Clearly letting her know the situation here is no better than there. The thought of the grands being on the street churns my stomach. But bringing them here is not a solution. It would strap husband and I to the point we couldn't help at all becaue we'd probably go bankrupt again. Then we'd all be in the same boat. If I lived there.......she'd be in my car and I'd drive her where ever she needed to go for help. I'd help her fill out forms and call people. And in countless other ways. But we're just too far apart to be of any real help. I don't like it. It doesn't sit well with the way I was raised. But I can't do anything about it either. So I will just have to continue to detach. [/QUOTE]
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