F
flutterbee
Guest
Where to start....
difficult child came in here and asked if easy child has gone to the store. Yep, he went last night. She complained that he didn't get her any of her ziti. I told her that I sent easy child to get her so I could ask her what she wanted, but she wouldn't come. She said she was still mad at me and didn't want to talk to me. Told her I was still angry with her, too, but I was still going to ask her what she wanted from the store.
THEN she tells me she doesn't even know what I was so upset about!!! She said, "Would you rather I just keep it all inside and not say anything and end up hating you?"
I told her she had no right to speak to me that way. That she has no responsibility around the house and I asked her to do one small thing and she was out of line. She told me that she was tired and she didn't want to do something that I was perfectly capable of doing.
Then I brought up her schoolwork. How we had a deal when I agreed to let her do this online school that she had to keep up with it. Of course, that's all my fault. I never help her. Correction. I take too long to help her. She said she tells me she needs help and I "take my time coming in here because whatever is on tv is more important". That's really interesting because I *might* watch 4 hours of tv a week and it's always in the evening. She's going on and on and on about how I never help her, I'm always this or always that.
I just got real quiet and didn't say a word. Inside my head is spinning and I'm just seething. Then she asks me, "Well, aren't you going to respond."
So I did. It went something along the lines of: "I never come in and help you? That's BS, Wynter. First of all, I'm always in here with you when you do your work. I might walk out of the room for a minute or two, but I'm always sitting right here with you. You don't want to do the work. You want to argue about how it's too hard, you can't do it, blah, blah, blah before you even look at the lesson. You have teachers you can call for help. They have daily online classes that you don't want to attend and when you do attend you don't want to participate. It is your schoolwork and your responsibility. I am happy to help you. I will not battle with you everyday anymore about doing your work. Bottom line is I'm not going to be the one that fails; you are."
She got quiet and I didn't look at her. Then, crying, says to me that she hates living here and do I even realize that the only time she cries is after she talks to me. Told her I was sorry she has such a horrible mother. She said she is, too.
Is she too old to put up for adoption?
NOTHING is ever her fault. Everyone is supposed to bail her out. We are all here to make life easy for her while she just skates on by.
I've tried so hard to parent her and to help her, guide her. Have I really failed this miserably? I have no idea where to go from here.