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Question for group - Son was kicked out on Friday
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 557211" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>Hi and welcome also from me!</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately I believe you are dead on when it comes to your son's plans. He is likely trying to guilt you into giving money or letting him back. You turned his life upside down at Friday and he is likely desperately trying to get back to status quo. However you need to stay firm. Your decision to kick him out was best for you and for him in this point and he needs to start figuring things out. But of course first he tries to get money from you, because that would be the easiest thing for him. If you can, try to take it (in your own mind) like when he was three and wanted candy before supper. He wants what he wants what he wants and tries everything to get it. But you would do him disservice to give it to you.</p><p></p><p>My George Foreman Grill can also throw in dramaqueenish and martyrish acts like no ones business. But he is getting over the part there he blames everyone and everything else for his problems. At least most of the time. I'm sure there is hope also for your son. Mine turned nineteen this summer and to be honest, he is still very immature and childish even after living on his own closer to two years now and currently working hard to grow up and get over his troubles. </p><p></p><p>My difficult child has always been a difficult child and what he did right before leaving home upset us a lot and I had very hard time liking him or even wanting to talk with him at the time. He was still under-aged at that time so we just couldn't wash our hands from him completely. If you had asked me then how I see my relationship with him in the future, I would have anticipated much bleaker prospects than how things have turned out for now at least. Yes, I'm still on eggshells with him (he is having all kinds of issues and I'm always afraid when other shoe will drop) and there are times when I'm not too fond with his behaviour, but still our relationship is closer and warmer than it has been in maybe ten years.</p><p></p><p>You would be wise to toughen yourself up to hard times with your son. It is very possible he will be very unpleasant for you for some time. Try to guilt you and manipulate you. But don't loose hope. Yours, like mine, is still very, very young. Still officially a teen. Keep that in mind. He has all the time on the world to get over himself and begin to take responsibility of his actions. Yes, there are those who never will, but when we are talking about 19-year-old prospects of that happening are still looking good. </p><p></p><p>Hugs, SuZir</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 557211, member: 14557"] Hi and welcome also from me! Unfortunately I believe you are dead on when it comes to your son's plans. He is likely trying to guilt you into giving money or letting him back. You turned his life upside down at Friday and he is likely desperately trying to get back to status quo. However you need to stay firm. Your decision to kick him out was best for you and for him in this point and he needs to start figuring things out. But of course first he tries to get money from you, because that would be the easiest thing for him. If you can, try to take it (in your own mind) like when he was three and wanted candy before supper. He wants what he wants what he wants and tries everything to get it. But you would do him disservice to give it to you. My George Foreman Grill can also throw in dramaqueenish and martyrish acts like no ones business. But he is getting over the part there he blames everyone and everything else for his problems. At least most of the time. I'm sure there is hope also for your son. Mine turned nineteen this summer and to be honest, he is still very immature and childish even after living on his own closer to two years now and currently working hard to grow up and get over his troubles. My difficult child has always been a difficult child and what he did right before leaving home upset us a lot and I had very hard time liking him or even wanting to talk with him at the time. He was still under-aged at that time so we just couldn't wash our hands from him completely. If you had asked me then how I see my relationship with him in the future, I would have anticipated much bleaker prospects than how things have turned out for now at least. Yes, I'm still on eggshells with him (he is having all kinds of issues and I'm always afraid when other shoe will drop) and there are times when I'm not too fond with his behaviour, but still our relationship is closer and warmer than it has been in maybe ten years. You would be wise to toughen yourself up to hard times with your son. It is very possible he will be very unpleasant for you for some time. Try to guilt you and manipulate you. But don't loose hope. Yours, like mine, is still very, very young. Still officially a teen. Keep that in mind. He has all the time on the world to get over himself and begin to take responsibility of his actions. Yes, there are those who never will, but when we are talking about 19-year-old prospects of that happening are still looking good. Hugs, SuZir [/QUOTE]
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