Quick- need magic vibes!!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by klmno, Sep 4, 2008.

  1. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    difficult child said last year that he wanted to try out for football this year. I supported that decision (and amazed myself) because I thought it would be good for him to have the physical activity and do something constructive that helped him learn how to channel some of this energy. Anyway, then he backed out right before school started this week. Today, he said he wanted to do it and wished he'd tried out. (Try-outs were Tuesday.)

    He doesn't want to do this right now for the right reasons (he wants girls' attention, the friend who was then wasn't and now somewhat is again just started football, and my talk with him about Rosie and needlepoint has gotten him motivated). But, I think it would be great for him anyway- energy, weight, mental focus, something constructive issues, etc.

    The problem is- try outs are over and there was a mandatory meeting on Tuesday for those who wanted to be on the team. difficult child has told me that all 8th graders who wanted to join always make the team and that there are only a few large 8th graders so they could use another one and other team players have told him that they wish he was on the team. I'm thinking I'll contact someone at school tomorrow and say something like "he's sorry he didn't try out, we were on vacation last week so hadn't kept up with requirements for this week, if you need someone who might be good at tackling please let us know". I'm not sure what else to do.

    I can contact his case manager and ask her advice, but I've never met her- they switched CM's for difficult child this year. I could contact the coach but he'd have no idea who difficult child is. I could contact the principal- she's been pretty nice since I mentioned my meetings with a Special Education attny last year and she could pull some strings, but I don't know that I want to take advantage of that for this kind of situation.

    So- if anyone has some miraculous control over this situation-please send vibes our way tonight and tomorrow!!! Unless- you think maybe I shouldn't pursue this. I have that doubt too since I know difficult child isn't really doing it for the right reasons. If you think I'd be making a mistake or sending him the wrong message to pursue it, please let me know.

    Thanks in advance!! I'm going to be starting another post about a different topic (therapist)- sorry- it's a busy time!!
     
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Klmno,
    I'm not sure how I would do it but I like your idea of writing the note you spoke about. I will be sending many positive vibes and crossing all body parts that something works out!
     
  3. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I don't know for sure what I would do either.

    If it is based on difficult child wanting it for the wrong reasons, then he missed the try outs.

    However, if you are feeling that this would really be a positive in his life, I would call the school and ask how strict they are. Explain that you feel that this would benefit difficult child in so many levels, excersising, socializing, structure, being part of a team.

    You may find it is not as big a deal as you thought. There are always circumstances for exceptions. If you present this as for your feeling this would be a very good thing for difficult child as a therapuetic type thing, it will go a lot longer than, "My boy changed his mind and now wants to be on the team."

    Good luck - let us know how this turns out.
     
  4. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    It can't hurt to ask! Sending positive football vibes your way!
     
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Thanks, everyone! I do think it would be very good for him, in several ways. I think I'll try to reach his case manager today, since I need to respond to an email she sent me yesterday anyway. I won't push it but I'll let her know about it and see if she has any suggestions. If the coach is firm about the deadline for try-outs, I won't make issue of it. But I figure you never know, maybe he really is wishing he had a couple more larger boys on the team and could use someone else who might be good at tackling!
     
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Sounds like you've got a good plan. If you don't try, you won't know. Best of luck.
    That's a hard age, even if it's not a difficult child.
     
  7. Christy

    Christy New Member

    Can't hurt to ask. I hope it goes well. At least if you try and the coach says no, difficult child will not be upset with you.

    Good Luck!
    Christy
     
  8. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    I agree, it can't hurt to ask.
    Sending positive football vibes your way, and crossing everything crossable.
     
  9. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I emailed case manager- she asked athletic director and it's too late. :( Thanks for trying to send the vibes...I really think difficult child would have gained so much from it, whether he enjoyed it or not.
     
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