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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 682165" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Well, <em>you would</em>, Insane.</p><p></p><p>And that your daughter would is huuuuuge (I am channeling my hero Bernie Sanders here.)</p><p></p><p>Long ago (OK, maybe 2 years) I stopped expecting anybody to be nice, or good, or real or anything really, except for requiring they treat me with common decency and the appearance of respect.</p><p></p><p>First. So what if people are self-preoccupied jerks? I do not need them in my life. If I start from the place that I expect nothing, there is nothing to lose.</p><p></p><p>Second. There are very few good and kind people. But there are good and kind people. That is the glass half full. You are one of them.</p><p></p><p>Third. That makes you extremely precious. Now is the time to begin to take care of and truly value ourselves. You know I have a profession. It is almost my birthday and I have to do continuing education. I am doing courses that will help me understand how to change into a person that values myself and treats myself well. I am reading books about loss and the loss of hope and what to do next. I am learning a lot.</p><p></p><p>You see, Insane, where you are right now many highly learned people believe is the starting point of real humanity and understanding and peace.</p><p></p><p>For me when my mother died I felt my whole life had been lived wrongly. Not only did I not have any chance anymore to make it different, I believed that everything I had done did not count because I had not done what I had really needed. It was a horrible and bleak time. You know that because I wrote of it many times on FOO.</p><p>Almost the only support in my life that I believe has really been true support is my relationship with M which came to me when I was about 60. I lived a life alone except for my son. I have been afraid of people for good reason.</p><p></p><p>I believe nothing is served from distance from the only people in our lives who really love us. Even if it seems like the goal is worth it, how could it be, if it comes at such a cost? How could a good result come from something that causes anyone such hurt?</p><p>That is really not true. Looked at that way nobody has the real ability to accomplish anything because we die.</p><p>You are at the point where people from a spiritual perspective believe we truly have the ability to build real meaning in our lives. If you are interested I will write down a few titles of books I am reading. It is very exciting, Insane, to finally know where I stand.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 682165, member: 18958"] Well, [I]you would[/I], Insane. And that your daughter would is huuuuuge (I am channeling my hero Bernie Sanders here.) Long ago (OK, maybe 2 years) I stopped expecting anybody to be nice, or good, or real or anything really, except for requiring they treat me with common decency and the appearance of respect. First. So what if people are self-preoccupied jerks? I do not need them in my life. If I start from the place that I expect nothing, there is nothing to lose. Second. There are very few good and kind people. But there are good and kind people. That is the glass half full. You are one of them. Third. That makes you extremely precious. Now is the time to begin to take care of and truly value ourselves. You know I have a profession. It is almost my birthday and I have to do continuing education. I am doing courses that will help me understand how to change into a person that values myself and treats myself well. I am reading books about loss and the loss of hope and what to do next. I am learning a lot. You see, Insane, where you are right now many highly learned people believe is the starting point of real humanity and understanding and peace. For me when my mother died I felt my whole life had been lived wrongly. Not only did I not have any chance anymore to make it different, I believed that everything I had done did not count because I had not done what I had really needed. It was a horrible and bleak time. You know that because I wrote of it many times on FOO. Almost the only support in my life that I believe has really been true support is my relationship with M which came to me when I was about 60. I lived a life alone except for my son. I have been afraid of people for good reason. I believe nothing is served from distance from the only people in our lives who really love us. Even if it seems like the goal is worth it, how could it be, if it comes at such a cost? How could a good result come from something that causes anyone such hurt? That is really not true. Looked at that way nobody has the real ability to accomplish anything because we die. You are at the point where people from a spiritual perspective believe we truly have the ability to build real meaning in our lives. If you are interested I will write down a few titles of books I am reading. It is very exciting, Insane, to finally know where I stand. COPA [/QUOTE]
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