PLEASE HELP ME. My son Nick is 22 years old. He is a "part-time" junior college student, barely. He sleeps all day (refuses to get a job) and stays out all night "partying" with his friends. His room is a mess, and I have to nag him to take a shower. He breaks our house rules constantly, and we have caught him stealing money from our wallets. He has also stolen our credit cards and bought beer and cigarettes without our permission. The money he has stolen from us adds up to the thousands. He always apologizes and promises to "change", but nothing ever changes. This has gone on for years now and I AM DONE. I feel bad for him because I know he is depressed and has very little self esteem, but even so, I am ready to kick him out. Where can he go so he doesn't end up on the street? We live in a middle class neighborhood--I am not familiar with homeless resources. Whenever we threaten to kick him out, he says he will kill himself. At his point I feel like we are being blackmailed. We have tried counseling and he is on medication (which probably doesn't work because he constantly smokes pot). I am literally at my wits end (he stole from my purse again last night) after he promised never to do so again. I think he needs a dose of hard, cold reality. I want to pack up his stuff and show him the front door. However, I also want to be able to give him a list of places he can go, but I don't know what to tell him. We live in California in the San Fernando Valley. If anyone out there has any advice for me, please contact me. I honestly believe he has a drug problem, but he won't admit it. I have offered to get him help or take him to a rehabilitation center, but he refuses this. The saddest part of all this is that he is brilliant. He graduated "valedictorian" from both middle and high school. He was always in the "highly gifted" programs throughout school, and got into almost every college he applied to, including a full scholarship to a respected school back east. He could have been anything he wanted to be. Some of his friends that he went to high school with are now graduating next semester, while he is puttering around taking mickey-mouse courses at junior college. After high school, he actually went to UCLA for 5 weeks and then dropped out. We have since watched him spiral downward and come apart. He is also an incredibly talented musician. But I cannot live this way any more. Help.