Reality = breakdown in the dressing room

Discussion in 'Healthful Living / Natural Treatments' started by hearts and roses, Nov 14, 2009.

  1. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    I've been doing WW for a couple of months now. I lose, then I gain, then I lose, then I gain. I can't seem (or didt really care enough) to stick with it 100% so I haven't been very successful. In fact, although I'm not gaining, I can't fit into anything anymore.

    So, today I went to Victoria Secrets to get myself a couple of much needed bras. I went up a size, not cup mind you, but the number size - that in and of itself is depressing, but I can deal. The salesgirl (all 6' of her skinny behind with flowing gorgeous blond curls) hands me a basket with all different bras in my size and escorts me to a dressing room. As soon as I was undressed, I was so focused on that gelatinous wiggly hanging over my pants middle, that I couldn't focus on the shape and fit of all the bras I tried on. I chose one, paid and left in shame. I cried for 20 minutes in my car.

    I am not fat. *Technically* am still in my weigh range for my height, perhaps over by aout 5 lbs. But I am so out of shape. And I haven't been able to kick start by behind into gear. I am not a morning person and by the time I get out of work, it's pitch black outside. My house is too nuts to do an exercise dvd at home, and with H lingering around, he'd be too annoying. And he mocks my efforts sometimes. I can't afford a gym - all the ones around my house are $90+ a month.

    I was thinking of maybe Jazzercise. I have to check it out.

    I am so disheartened and all I can think of is what our counselor said "When it hurts enough, you will change what you're doing". I think I'm there.
     
  2. ML

    ML Guest

    I love Jazzercize! I say go for it!
     
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Jo,
    I'm sorry that you are feeling so down. I've definitely been there before. Jazzercise sounds like it would be fun! Sending gentle hugs your way.
     
  4. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    That store is very intimidating, I start sweating in there. Everything looks like you have to be a model to even try it on. And, do not compare yourself to those teen girls that work there! They're just kids. Did you get a pretty bra? I hope so. You need a routine that is going to make you huffing and puffing and dripping sweat. You'll feel like a million dollars when you're finished. Open up your front door and start running, in 10 minutes you'll be sweating, in 20 you'll be drenched. Start at 20- run, walk....then build up in a few weeks to mostly running, and increase your time. THEN- You go back into Victorias Secret and buy another bra. That can be your motivation, your reward.....give yourself a reward every x amount of time. I swear, you'll never have that bad experiece in there again. 5 pounds, that won't take long once you have the right motivation. You can do it!!!
     
  5. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Yes, upallnight, VS can be an intimidating place. Every time I see a sassy, young, perfectly shaped young woman, I just want to smash her face. I know that's horrible!!!! And of course, I would never do such a thing and within a few seconds, my thoughts are, "OMG, I can't believe I thought that!!!!" Ugh, that feeling is even more nauseating than my original feeling, hahaha.

    Today is a new day and I am back on track. I had a healthful breakfast, drank some green tea mid-morning. When I went food shopping yesterday, I bought a lot of veggies so I can get back on my healthier cooking and eating. I have to remind myself that I am making GOOD healthy food to feed all the parts of my body...not to only lose weight. easy child will complain, she is such a pita about the foods we eat anyway, but I have to remind myself that she is 22 and if she doesn't like what I make, she can make her own food, right?

    I should add here that we already do eat healthy, organic foods most of the time. Rarely do I pig out on chips and dip or cakes and cookies, etc. I mean, I am a healthy eater. I've just become lazy about MOVING.

    So I've made a promise to myself to go for a fast paced walk every evening. Gradually, I will increase my speed and run intermittently. I cannot do long runs as my knees are awful. But as I build up my stamina, I think I will then be ready for something like Jazzercise.

    You're right, being able to confidently walk into VS and buy the bras or panties I want - ones that flatter me - is a great motivation. So is fitting back into my size 8 jeans comfortably instead of feeling like a stuffed sausage like I do now. Ew.

    Thanks for the positive feedback!
     
  6. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Jog,

    before I read your reply, I was going to suggest to you the same thing I suggested to Trinity. Go outside and walk. I live in the city and we have tons of walkers after 6 and even before 6am. When I leave for the gym at 5:45 in the dark, folks are walking.

    I'm glad you have woken to a better day! Just start out a few times a week. I know you will feel much more alive and better about yourself!

    Sharon
     
  7. SearchingForRainbows

    SearchingForRainbows Active Member

    Jo,

    I'm happy yesterday was a good day for you.:D I think you have a great plan!!! There is nothing like fresh air to clear your mind and walking is a wonderful way to lose weight and get into shape.:D When you're ready, Jazzercise sounds like fun.

    And, like Alyssa, I think it is a good idea to reward all your hard work by doing something special for yourself. I love the idea of going back to VS and buying yourself something nice.

    Keep posting here. Let us know how you're doing. Hoping your day is off to a healthy start... Hugs... SFR
     
  8. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I have started walking, because of the Dog! So I am forced to. But I am not a runner, i have had ankle surgery and it is just too much.
    The walking is wonderful. I started with about 1/2 an hour. Not as fast, now after only 2 weeks tomorrow I am going 1 hour and it feels great!
    What I am adding is these short sprints (for me! LOL) But I feel it. Fast walk, sprint, fast walk until I recover a bit and sprint.
    I only do it until it is too much and then I walk the rest.
    I have my music and I try to just enjoy myself and let it all go.
    Things are still horrible for me, but for that short time, my mind is CLEAR.

    I am a good weight, I fit into my jeans, but I am the same when I look into the mirror I can tone up I have the muffin top!
    I have the rolls on my belly. I would not want to come out of that dressing room naked or in just that bra! NOWAY
    I have lost a good deal of weight but it is the toning up that is the hardest. I loved jazzersize also. I did it through the YMCA when I used to do it, it was a blast.

    Good luck no matter what you do!
     
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