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Really? mother in law, Seriously?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 214097" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Toto, </p><p> </p><p>this is really quite simple. </p><p> </p><p>It takes both you AND husband full time to keep K stable. And you have N and her anxiety issues on top of this.</p><p> </p><p>You simply cannot sacrifice a month of their stability to have visitors/take care of elderly relatives.</p><p> </p><p>You, as much or more than anyone here, knows how hard it is to achieve stability for a bipolar child. Esp when medications don't work well or give such rough side effects as K has had.</p><p> </p><p>What are you going to do when K spins so far out of control AND you have an angry, loud, mean-acting mobility challenged elderly man to care for 24/7??</p><p> </p><p>If you agree to take in the grandfather you will do a great dis-service to your children. And your children will be around far longer to make you pay for it. (That sounds meaner than I intended, but I think you get my meaning - the grandfather will go home and the kids stay.)</p><p> </p><p>Anyway, it is time to ask about hiring someone to take care of him while mother in law is away or whatever. And explain to mother in law that you would love to help but until the kids are much older you just are not able to. But you could research hospice care, senior day cares, senior centers, etc... for her. Most of those have online info around here, surely in IN they do too.</p><p> </p><p>I KNOW for a FACT that my grandparents were much happier when they got out and did things with others at the Senior Center. And it added a good 8 years to my Grandma's life when we moved her into an assisted living facility. In fact, she lived long enough to meet Wiz when he was 10 weeks old. We flew him to see her. And watching them together was wonderful. She was so impressed with my husband that she instructed my mom to cover daycare of whatever was needed while I went back to finish college. (husband kept Wiz for an ENTIRE day while I worked with movers to move her from a small icky room to a nicer suite of 2 rooms. She said my grandpa would never have done that, LOL!)</p><p> </p><p>I hope I didn't speak too plainly. I support whatever you decide, but I have been thinking about this all day. I just don't see how you could sacrifice K's hard fought for stability to give mother in law 2 weeks, not when it might take months to get K back to stable.</p><p> </p><p>Especially when he says mean things about her. That just can't be tolerated, not in her home. The kids have a right not to hear that from ANYONE in their home.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 214097, member: 1233"] Toto, this is really quite simple. It takes both you AND husband full time to keep K stable. And you have N and her anxiety issues on top of this. You simply cannot sacrifice a month of their stability to have visitors/take care of elderly relatives. You, as much or more than anyone here, knows how hard it is to achieve stability for a bipolar child. Esp when medications don't work well or give such rough side effects as K has had. What are you going to do when K spins so far out of control AND you have an angry, loud, mean-acting mobility challenged elderly man to care for 24/7?? If you agree to take in the grandfather you will do a great dis-service to your children. And your children will be around far longer to make you pay for it. (That sounds meaner than I intended, but I think you get my meaning - the grandfather will go home and the kids stay.) Anyway, it is time to ask about hiring someone to take care of him while mother in law is away or whatever. And explain to mother in law that you would love to help but until the kids are much older you just are not able to. But you could research hospice care, senior day cares, senior centers, etc... for her. Most of those have online info around here, surely in IN they do too. I KNOW for a FACT that my grandparents were much happier when they got out and did things with others at the Senior Center. And it added a good 8 years to my Grandma's life when we moved her into an assisted living facility. In fact, she lived long enough to meet Wiz when he was 10 weeks old. We flew him to see her. And watching them together was wonderful. She was so impressed with my husband that she instructed my mom to cover daycare of whatever was needed while I went back to finish college. (husband kept Wiz for an ENTIRE day while I worked with movers to move her from a small icky room to a nicer suite of 2 rooms. She said my grandpa would never have done that, LOL!) I hope I didn't speak too plainly. I support whatever you decide, but I have been thinking about this all day. I just don't see how you could sacrifice K's hard fought for stability to give mother in law 2 weeks, not when it might take months to get K back to stable. Especially when he says mean things about her. That just can't be tolerated, not in her home. The kids have a right not to hear that from ANYONE in their home. [/QUOTE]
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Really? mother in law, Seriously?
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