Received so sad news yesterday!

[lovelyboy]

My heart is so hurt.....My little angels social worker phoned yesterday urgently...havent had contact for 2 yrs!
She told me that my liitle sons bio dad commited suicide last week! They dont know what the reasons were.....
It's as if I can just not get myself to move forward! I knew him only a little, but know he and biomom got engaged after 6 yrs and were so happy for the first time ....
I look at my son and my heart brakes for him to one day not have the chance to meet him! He was such an amazing, handsome and clever young man! Things just never seemed to work out for them!
I am hurt for bio mom, for his family and agh just so sad that I will never have the priviledge to show him what an awsome, beautiful little boy he gave us!
It's like everything changed!
And it makes me scared because my little son is having so much problems already with sensory integration and Auditory Processing Disorders (APD).....I asked the social worker to PLEASE try and get some medical background......but she sounded very apathetic! We have a semi open adoption.....so no direct contact.....

 

[SmallTownMom]

I am so sorry to hear that! My heart aches for you, your son and the family that is affected.

 

[buddy]

How totally heartbreaking. My first thought was that your son's being with you is such a blessing. Children who lose their parents to suicide suffer so much. This bio dad made a loving decision placing his precious son with you so that his issues would not have as directly an impact on him. He certainly will know the story at some time when he is older, but for now he has the stability and security and love in a stable home to work through whatever challenges he faces. It was meant to be that he is with you.

I hope bio dad is at peace. Very sad for all involved. Hugs to you....

 

[keista]

(((((hugs)))))

 

[DDD]

I am sorry and sending hugs your way. DDD

 

[Tiapet]

I'm sorry. They do say that there is a reason for everything and I believe this. Perhaps this is the reason that you are in his life and needed to be for certain. "hugs"

 

[hearts and roses]

I'm so sad for your aching heart. I will keep you and yours in my thoughts and prayers, gentle hugs.

 

[helpangel]

such a tragedy - sending hug's and peaceful thoughts your way. So glad your son has you, try to stay strong.

 

[lovelyboy]

Thanx for all your support....
Some things we cant share with any one.....then its nice to know that we can share it here.....and feel less lonely.....This is such a huge thing to carry alone.....cant share with any one, because they would just jump to conclusions....judge...put more labels around our childrens necks!!!!
Then its no wonder outsiders dont comprehent why some of our children has issues.....if they only knew.....so many things we as difficult child parents just need to absorb and carry with us....protecting our families....
I once read that we musn't speek our minds, critisize or try and think we know better how to solve other peoples lives if we dont know all the reasons behind their behaviour.....So true.....so very true.......

 

[Liahona]

Will the social worker let you have copies of pictures of him and the funeral and the grave site. You could make a book. Something your son can hold when the time comes that he is ready for the information. It might make it easier to have something of biodads to hold.

I'm sorry.

 

[Wiped Out]

I'm so very sorry.

 

[lovelyboy]

Liahona.....luckily we took nice pics of him and bio mom when we met them before the birth.....he was really such a handsome, caring young man......

 

[recoveringenabler]

I am so sorry.

 

[TerryJ2]

OMG, I am so sorry.
That is heartbreaking. I am so sorry for you and for your son. But I am glad that your son has you.
I do like the idea of a special album for difficult child, when the time comes.
Many hugs.