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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 619265" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>This was always a big concern of mine also. My difficult child was told in rehab that she had to break contact with all her old using friends. She did not and she relapsed quickly. She also broke all the rules in rehab regarding male/female contact and we know she was able to have some sexual contact with a few of the guys. It was an awful situation, she was 19, young and really cute and as soon as she walked in the door the guys just felll all over themselves trying to get to her and she loved it. When she got out she maintained contact with several of them. All but one either wanted sex or to use again with her. The one that didn't really liked her for her and I was so hoping they would develop a relationship. He was committed to staying clean and I was hoping they would help each other in that regard. She didn't like him that way, he has been clean for almost three years now.</p><p></p><p>The problem is when they get out they are suppose to surround themselves with others in recovery. I had to come to terms with that and finally realized that it was safer to be with those who were in recovery than those who weren't. My difficult child's substance of choice was alcohol, just about everyone in the outside world drinks so it would be hard for her to stay sober.</p><p></p><p>I know many of the girls my difficult child was in the sober house with are now in relationships with men in recovery and doing well. They keep each other clean/sober and go to meeting stogether. It al depends on whether the people he is in contact with are in serious recovery or not. My difficult child also made more drug contacts in rehab and I was very glad when she finally cut off contact with them.</p><p>I knew from snooping through difficult child's phone and facebook which contact were good and which weren't. </p><p></p><p>How is your difficult child acting? Is he going to meetings and does he sound like he is serious about recovery?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 619265, member: 59"] This was always a big concern of mine also. My difficult child was told in rehab that she had to break contact with all her old using friends. She did not and she relapsed quickly. She also broke all the rules in rehab regarding male/female contact and we know she was able to have some sexual contact with a few of the guys. It was an awful situation, she was 19, young and really cute and as soon as she walked in the door the guys just felll all over themselves trying to get to her and she loved it. When she got out she maintained contact with several of them. All but one either wanted sex or to use again with her. The one that didn't really liked her for her and I was so hoping they would develop a relationship. He was committed to staying clean and I was hoping they would help each other in that regard. She didn't like him that way, he has been clean for almost three years now. The problem is when they get out they are suppose to surround themselves with others in recovery. I had to come to terms with that and finally realized that it was safer to be with those who were in recovery than those who weren't. My difficult child's substance of choice was alcohol, just about everyone in the outside world drinks so it would be hard for her to stay sober. I know many of the girls my difficult child was in the sober house with are now in relationships with men in recovery and doing well. They keep each other clean/sober and go to meeting stogether. It al depends on whether the people he is in contact with are in serious recovery or not. My difficult child also made more drug contacts in rehab and I was very glad when she finally cut off contact with them. I knew from snooping through difficult child's phone and facebook which contact were good and which weren't. How is your difficult child acting? Is he going to meetings and does he sound like he is serious about recovery? [/QUOTE]
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