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request for advice-Picky eater with Sensory Issues
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 230489" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Nancy, your difficult child actually has quite a good variety, so don't panic and don't push him. Simply have those things available (they sound like mostly frozen food) but otherwise work towards following my methods that Numina quoted in the first post of this thread. For this to work your child needs to really trust that you will always allow him access to his favourite foods. That trust can take time to build up, so you may need to back off completely for a while. </p><p></p><p>We have been limited to the point where difficult child 3 would only eat one particular brand and variety of frozen fish - it had to be Birds Eye oven baked potato crumb, Dory fillets. Then they stopped making it and oh, the tantrums we had as he raged about unreliable manufacturers not taking kids like him into account! I suggested he write a letter of complaint to the company.</p><p></p><p>We began by extending difficult child 3's range. We had to with the fish, because his favourite was no longer on the shelves. So we would buy packets of this or that and try them. I had to eat a lot of fish that he declared he didn't like. he finally got so frantic for fish that he would eat something he didn't like as much but didn't actively hate.</p><p></p><p>So if your son will only eat a certain brand of chicken nugget, try him with another brand that looks as similar as possible. Engage him in an experiement - see if he can detect which plate of nuggets is which brand. Then follow my program above - what does he like about each type? What does he NOT like? Even if he doesn't love them, would he eat them to ward off starvation?</p><p></p><p>As you get his taste in nuggets broadened, you can work towards introducing him to the really good quality nuggets made from stamped out breast fillet. I did this by cutting open the different nuggets in front of difficult child 3. I really dislike, on principle, the nuggets that are made from the odd ends, bits and pieces, where the meat is steamed off the bones, scraped up and dehydrated then reconstituted into little cakes.</p><p></p><p>Once I got my kids to eat the nuggets made form stamped out fillet, it was a short step towards difficult child 3 & I working in the kitchen together to make home-made nuggets. We used the information we had as to what he likes about nuggets - the crisp crumb, the savoury flavour of the crumb, the moist meat inside - and tried to duplicate it. I made sure we had the oil hot enough to make the coating crispy and not soggy, and still keep the filling moist. I added salt and ground dried herbs to the crumb coating. I made sure we used flour, beaten egg and then crumbs. I've even used crushed rice bubbles instead of ordinary crumbs, or tempura batter. And often while what we make is different, once he's got used to tasting different kinds then tasting the home-made ones is just another tasting, with the added incentive of wanting to eat your own cooking because you KNOW what is in it.</p><p></p><p>We've also gone off a lot of prepackaged food since we found a rat molar (complete with the entire length of the root of the tooth) in a shop-bought lasagne. The only way that rat tooth got in there, was to have the rat fall in and the rat got cooked away into the meat sauce. This was not a rat that didn't look after it's teeth, or a rat that got into a fight and had a tooth punched out. The entire tooth was there, the length of the root, so it had to have been dissolved out of the rat's jaw. Bleah!</p><p></p><p>With the frozen waffles - we have a waffle maker and can make our own waffles. Once made they can be frozen. I often freeze home-cooked food because what difficult child 3 really likes about frozen food, is it's availability. I'll make burgers, cook the patties in bulk and then freeze the cooked patties so they can be quickly thawed, heated and made up into a home-cooked burger very quickly.</p><p></p><p>Nancy, try what I suggested above on how to gradually get a kid hooked on pizza. Begin with garlic bread made at home and take it from there, ingredient by ingredient. Never force him faster than he can go. Be prepared for him to only take one bite and no more, even if he says he likes it. It takes a lot of courage to make changes, having things the same is a great comfort.</p><p></p><p>Back before I was married, I had had a series of major problems especially long-term health problems, plus surgery that was traumatic. It took me a long time to recover emotionally. I had to drop out of uni because I had just been too unwell. I got a job in industry but it was far from perfect. My job was becoming increasingly stressful and I had to have something the same, something I could rely on. So I had my routine - I would order my luch in the mornings, I chose something very safe and no-fuss. Whenever I have been ill as a child, I was recovering when I was given Vegemite. The salty taste was often what I needed after endless glasses of flat lemonade, the savoury taste a refreshing break from too much blandness and sweetness. So every morning I orderd a Vegemite sandwich. I got to the pointwhere I was no longer enjoying them, but I didn't dare change because placing the order was part of my recovery routine, part of my therapy.</p><p>Then the day came when I had to accept that Vegemite sandwiches in the order were a big mistake - the sandwich shop was being staffed by non-Australians who didn't have a clue how to spread Vegemite (very thinly) andwhen I bit into too many thick, blobby, salty lumps which set my teeth on edge, I knew I'd ordered my last Vegemite sandwich from that shop. I was by this stage barely on speaking terms with my boss so I used the excuse of having to go out to choose my lunch, to not have to eat lunch with him at our work desks.</p><p></p><p>I had to go through that stage. It was my way of dealing with stress. To make the change had required a combination of recovery, of feeling safe, and of necessity. I was ready to discover that I enjoyed other foods and actually at this point tried something completely new in Australia - the Greek kebab. Wow! It had to be bought made fresh, you needed an appetitite, I had to walk to the specialty store to get it but it was the next step in my recovery.</p><p></p><p>What I'm saying - you need to find why your child does this. It's not necessarily fear of something new, it can be deeper. It could be Sensory Integration Disorder (SID). It could be reluctance to change anything, or to change to something they don't fully know and therefore fear. </p><p></p><p>A suggestion - get him to watch a sandwich hand make sandwiches. He doesn't have to eat the result, maybe get him to watch you place an order for yourself, then show him how you got what you asked for and it's just right, and you're enjoying it. A lot of this is about their need to be certain of their environment.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, I hope this can help a little.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 230489, member: 1991"] Nancy, your difficult child actually has quite a good variety, so don't panic and don't push him. Simply have those things available (they sound like mostly frozen food) but otherwise work towards following my methods that Numina quoted in the first post of this thread. For this to work your child needs to really trust that you will always allow him access to his favourite foods. That trust can take time to build up, so you may need to back off completely for a while. We have been limited to the point where difficult child 3 would only eat one particular brand and variety of frozen fish - it had to be Birds Eye oven baked potato crumb, Dory fillets. Then they stopped making it and oh, the tantrums we had as he raged about unreliable manufacturers not taking kids like him into account! I suggested he write a letter of complaint to the company. We began by extending difficult child 3's range. We had to with the fish, because his favourite was no longer on the shelves. So we would buy packets of this or that and try them. I had to eat a lot of fish that he declared he didn't like. he finally got so frantic for fish that he would eat something he didn't like as much but didn't actively hate. So if your son will only eat a certain brand of chicken nugget, try him with another brand that looks as similar as possible. Engage him in an experiement - see if he can detect which plate of nuggets is which brand. Then follow my program above - what does he like about each type? What does he NOT like? Even if he doesn't love them, would he eat them to ward off starvation? As you get his taste in nuggets broadened, you can work towards introducing him to the really good quality nuggets made from stamped out breast fillet. I did this by cutting open the different nuggets in front of difficult child 3. I really dislike, on principle, the nuggets that are made from the odd ends, bits and pieces, where the meat is steamed off the bones, scraped up and dehydrated then reconstituted into little cakes. Once I got my kids to eat the nuggets made form stamped out fillet, it was a short step towards difficult child 3 & I working in the kitchen together to make home-made nuggets. We used the information we had as to what he likes about nuggets - the crisp crumb, the savoury flavour of the crumb, the moist meat inside - and tried to duplicate it. I made sure we had the oil hot enough to make the coating crispy and not soggy, and still keep the filling moist. I added salt and ground dried herbs to the crumb coating. I made sure we used flour, beaten egg and then crumbs. I've even used crushed rice bubbles instead of ordinary crumbs, or tempura batter. And often while what we make is different, once he's got used to tasting different kinds then tasting the home-made ones is just another tasting, with the added incentive of wanting to eat your own cooking because you KNOW what is in it. We've also gone off a lot of prepackaged food since we found a rat molar (complete with the entire length of the root of the tooth) in a shop-bought lasagne. The only way that rat tooth got in there, was to have the rat fall in and the rat got cooked away into the meat sauce. This was not a rat that didn't look after it's teeth, or a rat that got into a fight and had a tooth punched out. The entire tooth was there, the length of the root, so it had to have been dissolved out of the rat's jaw. Bleah! With the frozen waffles - we have a waffle maker and can make our own waffles. Once made they can be frozen. I often freeze home-cooked food because what difficult child 3 really likes about frozen food, is it's availability. I'll make burgers, cook the patties in bulk and then freeze the cooked patties so they can be quickly thawed, heated and made up into a home-cooked burger very quickly. Nancy, try what I suggested above on how to gradually get a kid hooked on pizza. Begin with garlic bread made at home and take it from there, ingredient by ingredient. Never force him faster than he can go. Be prepared for him to only take one bite and no more, even if he says he likes it. It takes a lot of courage to make changes, having things the same is a great comfort. Back before I was married, I had had a series of major problems especially long-term health problems, plus surgery that was traumatic. It took me a long time to recover emotionally. I had to drop out of uni because I had just been too unwell. I got a job in industry but it was far from perfect. My job was becoming increasingly stressful and I had to have something the same, something I could rely on. So I had my routine - I would order my luch in the mornings, I chose something very safe and no-fuss. Whenever I have been ill as a child, I was recovering when I was given Vegemite. The salty taste was often what I needed after endless glasses of flat lemonade, the savoury taste a refreshing break from too much blandness and sweetness. So every morning I orderd a Vegemite sandwich. I got to the pointwhere I was no longer enjoying them, but I didn't dare change because placing the order was part of my recovery routine, part of my therapy. Then the day came when I had to accept that Vegemite sandwiches in the order were a big mistake - the sandwich shop was being staffed by non-Australians who didn't have a clue how to spread Vegemite (very thinly) andwhen I bit into too many thick, blobby, salty lumps which set my teeth on edge, I knew I'd ordered my last Vegemite sandwich from that shop. I was by this stage barely on speaking terms with my boss so I used the excuse of having to go out to choose my lunch, to not have to eat lunch with him at our work desks. I had to go through that stage. It was my way of dealing with stress. To make the change had required a combination of recovery, of feeling safe, and of necessity. I was ready to discover that I enjoyed other foods and actually at this point tried something completely new in Australia - the Greek kebab. Wow! It had to be bought made fresh, you needed an appetitite, I had to walk to the specialty store to get it but it was the next step in my recovery. What I'm saying - you need to find why your child does this. It's not necessarily fear of something new, it can be deeper. It could be Sensory Integration Disorder (SID). It could be reluctance to change anything, or to change to something they don't fully know and therefore fear. A suggestion - get him to watch a sandwich hand make sandwiches. He doesn't have to eat the result, maybe get him to watch you place an order for yourself, then show him how you got what you asked for and it's just right, and you're enjoying it. A lot of this is about their need to be certain of their environment. Anyway, I hope this can help a little. Marg [/QUOTE]
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