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General Parenting
Resource Specialist Conclusion - My Son Needs to Get His Act Together
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 362436" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Do you have a trusted friend who can help you through this? Someone who you can vent your anger with who can then help you come up with a strong but non-angry approach? It can be very difficult to keep frustration emotions out of a conversation and correspondence with the school. It is many times helpful to have another pair of trusted eyes to read through a draft to see if it sounds like you want it to sound. If you can stay as non-emotional as possible, the school will respond better. I do know this is difficult especially when the school makes you feel trapped - you want to come out swinging and clear through those people who are standing in your way.</p><p> </p><p>Once in awhile, someone here will post a portion of a letter (or the entire letter) and ask for input. If you are comfortable doing so, you can share with us parts of your correspondence that are more on the emotional side and we can try to provide input on how to make that statement strong without the emotions - make it more professional so the schools will not dismiss it from an angry parent who just needs to calm down (their insight, not mine). Lots of people here have learned the terminology that makes the schools stand up and listen.</p><p> </p><p>On a lighter note: I had to chuckle just a tad when you stated you used the BS word in an e-mail. My daughter uses "whatever" a lot when talking to me but when I actually see it in writing, I just laugh. You mean these words go beyond just SAYING them and someone actually will WRITE them? She also likes to use my least favorite four letter word and will put it in writing. That was actually the first time I had seen anyone put these types of word in writing. I am sorry your anger is so strong to bring you to this. </p><p> </p><p>Follow Midwest Mom's advise of finding your State's advocate. I am sure that person is also used to working with angry parents and will give advise on termonolgy to use and not use at meetings. The school will use your anger against you if you show it during meetings. Like our kids like to keep the focus off the issue, the school will try to take the focus off your child's need and keep it on your anger. You will need to fight to keep the focus on the needs of your child.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 362436, member: 5096"] Do you have a trusted friend who can help you through this? Someone who you can vent your anger with who can then help you come up with a strong but non-angry approach? It can be very difficult to keep frustration emotions out of a conversation and correspondence with the school. It is many times helpful to have another pair of trusted eyes to read through a draft to see if it sounds like you want it to sound. If you can stay as non-emotional as possible, the school will respond better. I do know this is difficult especially when the school makes you feel trapped - you want to come out swinging and clear through those people who are standing in your way. Once in awhile, someone here will post a portion of a letter (or the entire letter) and ask for input. If you are comfortable doing so, you can share with us parts of your correspondence that are more on the emotional side and we can try to provide input on how to make that statement strong without the emotions - make it more professional so the schools will not dismiss it from an angry parent who just needs to calm down (their insight, not mine). Lots of people here have learned the terminology that makes the schools stand up and listen. On a lighter note: I had to chuckle just a tad when you stated you used the BS word in an e-mail. My daughter uses "whatever" a lot when talking to me but when I actually see it in writing, I just laugh. You mean these words go beyond just SAYING them and someone actually will WRITE them? She also likes to use my least favorite four letter word and will put it in writing. That was actually the first time I had seen anyone put these types of word in writing. I am sorry your anger is so strong to bring you to this. Follow Midwest Mom's advise of finding your State's advocate. I am sure that person is also used to working with angry parents and will give advise on termonolgy to use and not use at meetings. The school will use your anger against you if you show it during meetings. Like our kids like to keep the focus off the issue, the school will try to take the focus off your child's need and keep it on your anger. You will need to fight to keep the focus on the needs of your child. [/QUOTE]
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