Good morning, afternoon, evening everybody. I'm a returnee posting under a new username (used to post with my real name and decided that perhaps that's not such a great idea...it is a small world after all). I'm still working on my signature, to consolidate what is going on with my three kids, aged 18 to 12. In the meantime, I'm reeling from the revelation last night that my youngest, who does not have a diagnosis and has been my healthiest child, has had sexual intercourse with a boy she goes to school with. He is 13 and I suspect his parents do not know. My daughter has not admitted the truth to me but she did confide in her older sister. I don't know where this happened, when, how many times, or if they used protection. I'm guessing not. because yesterday afternoon she came to me and asked if I thought she was getting fat. She complained that her breasts were getting larger (I didn't notice anything, but most of her friends are as developed as she is, or more) and her belly sticking out. Then she told me she hadn't had her period in six weeks and she was worried about that. That's when I broke out in a cold sweat. She denied having sex or even heavy petting, yet she still seemed upset. I went to the drugstore, got an EPT Gold test, sent her to the bathroom, and she emerged several minutes later withthe wet tests, both saying "no." She seemed triumphant. Later in the evening, she told her sister that she did have sex but wouldn't tell us the boy's name. I made a panicked phone call to a therapist who has been working with our family through the divorce, and who has expressed concern over my daughter's precocious sexuality. I'm taking her to a gynecologist as soon as I can get an appointment next week, and if she is not pregnant I think she must go on some form of effective birth control. Short of chaining her to the stove, I don't know how to completely prevent her from being with this boy again. Assuming I have the right kid. I'm just sick about this. If she is pregnant, I just can't even think that far ahead. When I was 16, I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend, and got pregnant. The notion of telling my parents was so unthinkable (we were traditional Catholics) that I chose the easy way out and had an abortion. It wasn't so easy, because the guilt put me into a deep depression that still resonates with me thirty years later, and has affected the way I have been raising my kids. I kept my abortion secret from my parents and family and was terrified that I would be found out. It took a lot of counseling, both psychological and spiritual, to get me to forgive myself. My 'tween daughter has told me that she would never have an abortion. I'm thinking to myself, I can't barely hang on right now to my sanity, how the h*** will I get through a 13 yr old going through hard labor? Her father has no idea of any of this. She has been avoiding him the past few months, refusing to stay overnight at his house (part of the agreed-upon visitation) in favor of being with her girlfriends. She is pretty, outgoing (to say the least), just made the varsity cheerleading squad, and had told me just weeks ago that she wants to do better in school this year. She is preoccupied with her social life, as are a lot of junior high girls, and there is room for improvement in her grades. I'm torn between rage and wanting to slap her across the face for lying to me and for being so stupid and unaware, and wanting to protect her from herself. Has anyone here been through anything like this. I'm mean good God, she's 12. I feel like someone has hit me over the head with a board. If anyone in my family finds out about this they will be horrified, and she will be shunned. They aren't the most forgiving bunch.