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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 520035" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>I appreciate your feisty response, Susiestar, but here again we are with cultural differences... As an Englishwoman I do not like conflict, making waves, public scenes or being directly "rude" to someone <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> Seriously, though, I would actually be capable of telling a teacher in this kind of situation that I am not happy but it really wouldn't be appropriate in this case. Context is all... Tiny village school, only one teacher, everyone knows each other, a context in which (unlike the States) there is much less interaction between school and home and parents expect just to leave school to it. It's like when I discovered that she was hitting J (and another boy) on the head... I couldn't tackle her directly about it. That would have been disastrous! Instead I went to see her and expressed concern that someone was hitting him on the head because he kept flinching and protecting his head when he was scolded; I asked whether there was any possibility someone in the school (there are two assistants) was doing it, looking very bewildered. It was very clear from her body language that she was ill at ease and the one responsible. Since that time, the hitting stopped... If I had gone in all guns blazing, I would have alienated her, not achieved what I wanted and probably made her vindictive towards him for life... Sometimes softlee, softlee, catchee monkey, you know? Not that I am particularly temperamentally suited to that approach, I should add. </p><p>And then... people are always much more than just their faults or flaws, if you know what I mean. She isn't just a tyrant and a dragon. I think she is fond of children, deep down, and is certainly dedicated to their learning. And J... likes her. Strange but true. I have quite often thought when we talk about him that she also likes him. So, things are never black and white. </p><p>Yes, the walkie talkies. These are totally needed. Last night J again disappeared after I said he could go and ride his bike near us and then I couldn't find him; two teenage boys we know ended up scouring the village for him on their motorbikes... I was really cross when he got back and said he is not going out again until the "talkie walkies" arrive. He screamed, cried and shouted in protest, but this morning accepts it. We will have to have rules about their use, of course, and he will have to respect the rules. I hope the walkie talkies work. The village is on a small hill surrounded by a small valley...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 520035, member: 11227"] I appreciate your feisty response, Susiestar, but here again we are with cultural differences... As an Englishwoman I do not like conflict, making waves, public scenes or being directly "rude" to someone :) Seriously, though, I would actually be capable of telling a teacher in this kind of situation that I am not happy but it really wouldn't be appropriate in this case. Context is all... Tiny village school, only one teacher, everyone knows each other, a context in which (unlike the States) there is much less interaction between school and home and parents expect just to leave school to it. It's like when I discovered that she was hitting J (and another boy) on the head... I couldn't tackle her directly about it. That would have been disastrous! Instead I went to see her and expressed concern that someone was hitting him on the head because he kept flinching and protecting his head when he was scolded; I asked whether there was any possibility someone in the school (there are two assistants) was doing it, looking very bewildered. It was very clear from her body language that she was ill at ease and the one responsible. Since that time, the hitting stopped... If I had gone in all guns blazing, I would have alienated her, not achieved what I wanted and probably made her vindictive towards him for life... Sometimes softlee, softlee, catchee monkey, you know? Not that I am particularly temperamentally suited to that approach, I should add. And then... people are always much more than just their faults or flaws, if you know what I mean. She isn't just a tyrant and a dragon. I think she is fond of children, deep down, and is certainly dedicated to their learning. And J... likes her. Strange but true. I have quite often thought when we talk about him that she also likes him. So, things are never black and white. Yes, the walkie talkies. These are totally needed. Last night J again disappeared after I said he could go and ride his bike near us and then I couldn't find him; two teenage boys we know ended up scouring the village for him on their motorbikes... I was really cross when he got back and said he is not going out again until the "talkie walkies" arrive. He screamed, cried and shouted in protest, but this morning accepts it. We will have to have rules about their use, of course, and he will have to respect the rules. I hope the walkie talkies work. The village is on a small hill surrounded by a small valley... [/QUOTE]
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