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Running out of ideas for punishments that Work for 5 year old
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 467071" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px">I am sure you will get lots of ideas here. I just have a couple of questions, did she start this around the time you were getting ready for the baby???</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px">Also, having been a teacher for a long long time (as well as owned a group day care) we would see that kids around 5/6 go have similar issues to toddler/terrible twos. The same triggers hit them but at this age...separation, monsters etc. are even bigger fears and they are unable to deal with these things because they are cognitively even more aware. We talked about it so much I started digging out my old child development books and looking online and sure enough it is a documented trend for lots of kids. Once we realized kids were not just falling apart and it was developmental, it helped us to cope and treat it better. </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px">These things may not explain the entire seriousness of your issue, but may be contributors. (or not??)</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px">Anyway, I too have found punishment does nothing, spanking when my difficult child was young just caused him to fight back...like nothing happened for me to give a consequence...I was just the bad guy and he had to defend himself. I only tried it twice in huge issues of safety (inc. using a knife to destroy a trampoline). For us (way different kid, way different issues I realize) I have to identify what triggers him, avoid those as much as possible. He needs logical consequences for the big issues and I let lots go for now...we tick things off bit by bit. Most people call it picking and choosing your battles. He also has a behavior/mood regulation program where he has learned that he needs to be in a calm/following directions place (green zone) and if he gets moderately out of control (yellow zone) or crazy out of control(red zone) he is being taught how to get back into green. It is really working great! Not just at school but at home and he has Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers who take him out for a few hours and they work on things too...we all use the same words to help him. TONS of consistency, routine, keeping his anxiety as low as possible and helping him to stay in a more cooperative place.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'comic sans ms'"><span style="font-size: 10px">Dont know if that helps, but???? Hang in there...it is not an easy thing.</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 467071, member: 12886"] [FONT=comic sans ms][SIZE=2]I am sure you will get lots of ideas here. I just have a couple of questions, did she start this around the time you were getting ready for the baby??? Also, having been a teacher for a long long time (as well as owned a group day care) we would see that kids around 5/6 go have similar issues to toddler/terrible twos. The same triggers hit them but at this age...separation, monsters etc. are even bigger fears and they are unable to deal with these things because they are cognitively even more aware. We talked about it so much I started digging out my old child development books and looking online and sure enough it is a documented trend for lots of kids. Once we realized kids were not just falling apart and it was developmental, it helped us to cope and treat it better. These things may not explain the entire seriousness of your issue, but may be contributors. (or not??) Anyway, I too have found punishment does nothing, spanking when my difficult child was young just caused him to fight back...like nothing happened for me to give a consequence...I was just the bad guy and he had to defend himself. I only tried it twice in huge issues of safety (inc. using a knife to destroy a trampoline). For us (way different kid, way different issues I realize) I have to identify what triggers him, avoid those as much as possible. He needs logical consequences for the big issues and I let lots go for now...we tick things off bit by bit. Most people call it picking and choosing your battles. He also has a behavior/mood regulation program where he has learned that he needs to be in a calm/following directions place (green zone) and if he gets moderately out of control (yellow zone) or crazy out of control(red zone) he is being taught how to get back into green. It is really working great! Not just at school but at home and he has Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers who take him out for a few hours and they work on things too...we all use the same words to help him. TONS of consistency, routine, keeping his anxiety as low as possible and helping him to stay in a more cooperative place. Dont know if that helps, but???? Hang in there...it is not an easy thing.[/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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