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General Parenting
Running out of ideas for punishments that Work for 5 year old
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 470053" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Janet... I'd be happy if J accepted to go in time outs and I felt it made him understand some connection between the mistaken action and the time out... but he doesn't and it doesn't... Though I think in any case I would have a different sense than you of this scenario (surprise, surprise <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" />) I would feel that "paying" for the vase in some manner was fair only if the child had deliberately broken it. In your situation, it was still an accident, arising out of the fact that he or she had been jumping on the couch or running in the house. In which case.... I would think of something useful the child could do instead using energy, some form of work around the house they could contribute to - sweeping up, helping with the laundry, bringing in logs, depending on age. </p><p>I try to make things natural and related. If J spills something (as he did today), he wipes it up with a cloth. He puts his clothes in the laundry basket to be washed. He tidies his bath toys away after the bath... small things that are actually quite radical in the Moroccan context where boys are never asked to help in any form in the house. I certainly don't want him growing up like that... </p><p>J gets upset when I get cross with him or raise my voice. It seems to have an effect. We all do what we can, with the tools available to us and according to our best lights...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 470053, member: 11227"] Janet... I'd be happy if J accepted to go in time outs and I felt it made him understand some connection between the mistaken action and the time out... but he doesn't and it doesn't... Though I think in any case I would have a different sense than you of this scenario (surprise, surprise :)) I would feel that "paying" for the vase in some manner was fair only if the child had deliberately broken it. In your situation, it was still an accident, arising out of the fact that he or she had been jumping on the couch or running in the house. In which case.... I would think of something useful the child could do instead using energy, some form of work around the house they could contribute to - sweeping up, helping with the laundry, bringing in logs, depending on age. I try to make things natural and related. If J spills something (as he did today), he wipes it up with a cloth. He puts his clothes in the laundry basket to be washed. He tidies his bath toys away after the bath... small things that are actually quite radical in the Moroccan context where boys are never asked to help in any form in the house. I certainly don't want him growing up like that... J gets upset when I get cross with him or raise my voice. It seems to have an effect. We all do what we can, with the tools available to us and according to our best lights... [/QUOTE]
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Running out of ideas for punishments that Work for 5 year old
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