First I want to say that husband's last job interview seemed to go well. This is the one in Charlotte. We have not heard back yet, though... I saw Dr. K, my old therapist on Thursday. She was of course very patient with me and listened to my "recap" of my relationship with L and L's dad and Dr. C. She assured me that no one in the psychiatric community takes Dr. C seriously, they all think she is a fraud. She's had multiple complaints to the board, but since she hasn't broken their very narrow rules of malpractice, she's never been disciplined. I want to make an aside here. Dr. C. has a beautiful web page. She's an MD who did a regular residency in Pediatrics and one in Psychiatry just like every other doctor in the USA. She has no further education and no specialty on her license. She advertises herself as a "Pediatric Behavioralist". This is not a recognized field. She's been riding the gravy train from testifying as an "expert witness" at that first trial of ours when she had barely graduated medication school and never once looked back. She and L's dad have made quite the killing off of that. But, I digress... When I told Dr. K about my lunch with L, and how I felt about it and that we were just ready to move on, she told me that she understood the way I felt, and advised me to consider how much weight and power I give to L and her dad over me. She agreed that L's dad's recent statements that when he was younger he did things that were terrible to me and now he's a better man are bull-pucky. I believe Dr. K called it a "lie", to be exact. She said he's still doing the same thing, so why bother saying he regrets past behavior? Because it makes him feel better about himself. What else would you expect from a diagnosed NPD? If he were actually sorry, he would have told L that he wouldn't finance her wedding unless she included me appropriately and didn't make me feel like a piece of dirt. He's still the same old, same old. Dr . K told me that if she had been sitting across the table from L when we had lunch, and L had said such awful things to her, she would have wanted to slap L in the face, and she would have been hard pressed to stop herself. She would most certainly have not been as kind as I was. She would not have walked away without putting L in her proper place, to be sure. I'm sure she would have been able to do it without cursing and name-calling, but that's the beauty of being a psychiatrist. You can really know what to say to take someone down without sounding like a monster. Unfortunately - or fortunately - all I have is the ability to walk away with my head held high. I'll be darned if I'm going to say anything to L that could ever be used against me. NEVER. In any case, she advised me to not throw the baby out with the bath-water if everything here is good other than our situation with our crazy families. It deserves some serious thought. So, here we sit. husband's resumé's are out there. I'm not nearly as angry as I was, but you can be sure I will not ever forget that I was "not really ever much of a mother" to L. If a job offer comes from far away, it's meant to be. If nothing comes for a few more weeks, we re-evaluate. Maybe talk to the recruiters and companies that didn't take the opportunity to hire husband this time but might next time. But I have nothing to be ashamed of. That being said, we wouldn't sneeze at a 70% pay bump. It's hard knowing that there are people around the country who will pay so much more than he is earning here. Then again, he gets 7 weeks of PTO here. Not that he ever takes that much, but still. It would be very difficult to go back to one or two weeks vacation a year. Thanks, all, for helping me to stay strong. And cross your fingers for NC to happen! I told husband he could have a new car if we moved. PS - I almost forgot - after two weeks of antibiotic induced diarrhea, I've begun to at least be able to go out of the house without fear the past couple of days. You can imagine my great joy that tomorrow I begin my laxative prep for my Colonoscopy. If anyone tries to tell you I'm full of it, you know darned well that's not true! Also, husband and I went to see "The Artist" today. It's such a sweet movie. If you get the chance, go see it. You'll love it!