Scared Me to DEATH!!

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by susiestar, Feb 14, 2009.

  1. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I took Jess and thank you to run an errand. I needed Jess to consult on some threads for the mermaid I am stitching for her. I wanted thank you to come so he wouldn't disturb husband's nap. I offered to let thank you go into Gamestop, and then we saw Claire's had a big sale. I let Jess go in there.

    As a TRIAL I let thank you stay outside if the smell/noise in Claire's was a problem for him. First time I have done this. We were only in there 5 mins ON THE CLOCK. I actually set a timer because I at least wanted to check on thank you in 5 mins.

    Nothing Jess decided to buy, so we left.

    I walked out and thank you was in TEARS. I could NOT get him to tell me why. he just kept saying he didn't want to talk about it. (He is a sensitive child and cries easily, but still.)

    I had Jess walk a bit away so she couldn't overhear us and he still wouldn't tell me. So we went home.

    When we got home I had Jess go inside and told thank you he had to tell me what was going on. I insisted he tell me if he was touched inappropriately, hurt by someone, someone said something mean, etc...

    He swore NONE of that happened.

    Finally it came out that he had $$$ that he thought was missing.

    THAT was SUCH a RELIEF that I could have cried. I spent a long time living in a big city and was SO SCARED that someone had hurt my baby.

    I had him write down what he had purchased and how much it cost. I also told him we would watch all his pants pockets and see if we could find the $$. (And I explained this is WHY he has a jar to keep $$ in - to prevent this!)

    Ladies, I cannot tell you how terrified I was when I walked out and saw him in tears and he would not talk to me. I probably will not be able to handle letting him stand outside a store alone for quite a while. I know he is 9, I know he is good about staying in a set area when given boundaries, but MY nerves cannot handle that again.

    I will stay out WITH him next time, not watch through the glass windows of the store!

    And I will have words with my father and my oldest son who have been telling him "real men don't show their feelings" and carp like that.
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Susie, I'm the woman who wouldn't let her kids stay home alone until they were about 14. I so understand.

    I hope his money shows up, poor kid.

    easy child is trying to break sister in law from the boys don't cry thing. Darrin is 5 for pete's sake. Nothing can make easy child more livid faster than sister in law telling Darrin to hoover it up. The only effect it has on Darrin is to make him cry harder, while desperately trying not to show it.
  3. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I am the same way - jump to the worse possibility. When our kids are so very upset and refuse to talk about it then what can it be but awful? Surely they will not cry over something insignificant.

    I would react the same way. I am so glad he finally told you what was bothering him. I hope he finds the $$$$ and I am glad he stayed safe.

    I know I am considered overly protective of my kids but I am amazed at how many people don't seem to be protective at all of theirs. There are so many horrid stories out there and it takes but a few minutes for your child to become one. It is super hard to allow our kids to become independent and keep them safe at the same time.

    Hugs - has your heart settled down yet?
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I was so much more restrictive with Wiz. He was 9 before I let him go into a bathroom by himself. And older before it was one that had more than 1 stall! With thank you he shows so much more common sense and so much less "problem behavior" that I let him do more.

    and he is REALLY bugged by smells in Claire's, so badly it can end up ruining the entire day for him and anyone around him. But all that crying! I don't mind it when I know what it is about, but lately he will ONLY tell Jessie.

    We did figure out that he spent all but $5 of the missing $$. He kept buying items that were $5 or so, even though we warned him not to or he would not be able to buy the big ticket item he wanted.

    He is OK. And my nerves have recovered! I am sure the other $5 is either in the pocket of a pair of shorts or somewhere behind his bed.

    Glad you all understand!!
  5. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    I can remember being 8 and having brother who was 9 being approached by a man who scared him to death. I taught all of mine at an early age to yell if they felt uncomfortable in a situation. It is so horrible to feel that feeling and not know what is wrong. Hopefully thank you knows he can talk to you If not he knows that Jess is there.
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Yes, I have reinforced over and over to ALL my kids that they could talk to me about anything. And he DOES talk to Jess a lot. And to Wiz. Wiz and I both have made him practice what to say and do if someone comes up to him and says or does something that makes him feel uncomfortable.

  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Aw, Susie, {{{hugs}}}
  8. ML

    ML Guest

    just adding hugs of understanding. I'm the same way and can't imagine my kid alone in the house at 12 unless a lot happens in the next 2 years to convince me otherwise. xo ML
  9. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I would have been terrified as well to come out and find him in tears. Many hugs.
  10. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    I can imagine the terror you felt when you saw your baby crying!!! I would have panicked as well. I am a nervous wreck about stuff like that. You just never know.

    I am so happy that he is okay and the issue was only money!!

    I hope he is able to find the missing money.