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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 234009" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Thanks all! I remembered later today that PO told me she's off work tomorrow- that it was a holiday for them. That probably means the clerk's office is closed to. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> I will have to wait until Monday to get anything back in for a chins.</p><p></p><p>I thought I spent all of the time with difficult child's therapist rambling on about the happenings since we talked last. But I did tell him that I thought what casued this was due to medications used for depression and physical illness causing rapid cycling. However, I'm sure that a big part of the problem is difficult child's lack of good friends and facing the natural consequences of everything resulting from me having to pay restitution and other factors leading us to have no money, difficult child having no friends, having to stay supervised, run from appointment to appointment, etc. difficult child feels like he's at the bottom of a hole and it's hopeless. therapist said he could see this.</p><p></p><p>I said he shouldn't have been discharged when he was in Dec. He said that difficult child does fine at the psychiatric hospital and they see no problem with him. I said ok, but he comes home and feels like he's back in the same hole. Then he said he wanted to do a family meeting when difficult child comes in next wed. (He's assuming he'll be home by then) so we can all come up with a plan so difficult child doesn't feel that way and so things aren't the same. Ok.</p><p></p><p>But I'm sitting here getting royally ticked. First of all, this hole that difficult child feels, I feel it too. But no plan that we discuss is going to change it. The things on my list need are needed in order for it to change and difficult child's cycling needs back under control. I am soooo going to scream if this is turning into a situation of me compromising what I am doing with some idealistic thought that it means difficult child won't be aggressive at the drop of a hat or that we won't feel like we are living in a hole that there's no way out of because I cook dinner earlier or give him more computer time. </p><p></p><p>Nope- I'm not willing to do the 'ole behavior modification or traditional family therapy here under some ridiculous pretense that it will solve these problems. Any therapist or anyone else that thinks this will change things has never lived with my difficult child. Whatever possibility there was that I would pick difficult child up and bring him home from this psychiatric hospital stay is quickly diminishing.</p><p></p><p>If therapist thinks the only problem is in my house, than they can all start looking for another place for difficult child to live. That stupid approach was tried a long time ago with difficult child. Now, when anyone starts it I asked "what I'm supposed to do when grounding him doesn't work, what am I supposed to do when sending him to his room doesn't work, or loss of tv priviledges doesn't work, etc and/or he becomes aggressive or self-harming" eventually, they all come back to the same thing- then call 911. Well, HELLO. It's going in circles. </p><p></p><p>therapist said difficult child told him "I don't care" a whole lot about different things. Personally, I think someone needs to be working with difficult child to help him see that his anger and depression and negative feelings about himself are not going to change as a result of anything I do or don't do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 234009, member: 3699"] Thanks all! I remembered later today that PO told me she's off work tomorrow- that it was a holiday for them. That probably means the clerk's office is closed to. :( I will have to wait until Monday to get anything back in for a chins. I thought I spent all of the time with difficult child's therapist rambling on about the happenings since we talked last. But I did tell him that I thought what casued this was due to medications used for depression and physical illness causing rapid cycling. However, I'm sure that a big part of the problem is difficult child's lack of good friends and facing the natural consequences of everything resulting from me having to pay restitution and other factors leading us to have no money, difficult child having no friends, having to stay supervised, run from appointment to appointment, etc. difficult child feels like he's at the bottom of a hole and it's hopeless. therapist said he could see this. I said he shouldn't have been discharged when he was in Dec. He said that difficult child does fine at the psychiatric hospital and they see no problem with him. I said ok, but he comes home and feels like he's back in the same hole. Then he said he wanted to do a family meeting when difficult child comes in next wed. (He's assuming he'll be home by then) so we can all come up with a plan so difficult child doesn't feel that way and so things aren't the same. Ok. But I'm sitting here getting royally ticked. First of all, this hole that difficult child feels, I feel it too. But no plan that we discuss is going to change it. The things on my list need are needed in order for it to change and difficult child's cycling needs back under control. I am soooo going to scream if this is turning into a situation of me compromising what I am doing with some idealistic thought that it means difficult child won't be aggressive at the drop of a hat or that we won't feel like we are living in a hole that there's no way out of because I cook dinner earlier or give him more computer time. Nope- I'm not willing to do the 'ole behavior modification or traditional family therapy here under some ridiculous pretense that it will solve these problems. Any therapist or anyone else that thinks this will change things has never lived with my difficult child. Whatever possibility there was that I would pick difficult child up and bring him home from this psychiatric hospital stay is quickly diminishing. If therapist thinks the only problem is in my house, than they can all start looking for another place for difficult child to live. That stupid approach was tried a long time ago with difficult child. Now, when anyone starts it I asked "what I'm supposed to do when grounding him doesn't work, what am I supposed to do when sending him to his room doesn't work, or loss of tv priviledges doesn't work, etc and/or he becomes aggressive or self-harming" eventually, they all come back to the same thing- then call 911. Well, HELLO. It's going in circles. therapist said difficult child told him "I don't care" a whole lot about different things. Personally, I think someone needs to be working with difficult child to help him see that his anger and depression and negative feelings about himself are not going to change as a result of anything I do or don't do. [/QUOTE]
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