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General Parenting
school problem we never had before ( sorry, longer than I thought)
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<blockquote data-quote="Rumpole" data-source="post: 554019" data-attributes="member: 15255"><p>(Disclaimer : Resident difficult child)</p><p></p><p><img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /></p><p></p><p>Sounds tough sjexpress. I remember that age very well, that's the year when I went from a student who was not just getting good grades, but top scoring student in my state (New South Wales in Australia, which has 7 million people, about as many people as New Jersey), to going off the rails, to ending up in year 10 leaving school and ending up on heroin. Granted, I have made good and I did well in university and I'm at law school now, but I wouldn't wish my 15 - 18 years on anyone.</p><p></p><p>It's incredibly hard if his schedule makes it difficult to get to classes on time, but he'll be punished anyway. Not only is it unfair, it messes up the conditioning that parents try so hard to instil in their children (behave well, rewards... behave badly, punishment). It sounds like it's very rough on him at the moment. Medication might be the answer, or it might not.</p><p></p><p>What is important, from a legal perspective (speaking with my law student hat on), the school has a "duty of care". Punishing him for something he has no control over will cause, in a reasonably foreseeable way, mental distress and injury. It is not fair, right or proper for them to say "It's only detention, it's only an hour". When a child is a good student particularly, as your son clearly is, being punished for something out of their control is damaging and inappropriate. It's worthwhile making clear to the school that you won't hesitate to do whatever's in your son's best interests, including involving a lawyer and filing suit, or getting the local media involved.</p><p></p><p>He sounds like a very talented young guy, he deserves the best chance in life. All I can say is do whatever you have to to support him in staying at school every day; I know it might be much more of an effort and impost on trying to juggle all your responsibilities, but I can assure you it will pay dividends.</p><p></p><p>Hope it all works out</p><p>'</p><p>Rumpole</p><p></p><p>(Disclaimer : This is not legal advice, please seek advice from a licenced attorney in your state before proceeding in respect of threatening legal action or commencing legal action)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rumpole, post: 554019, member: 15255"] (Disclaimer : Resident difficult child) :( Sounds tough sjexpress. I remember that age very well, that's the year when I went from a student who was not just getting good grades, but top scoring student in my state (New South Wales in Australia, which has 7 million people, about as many people as New Jersey), to going off the rails, to ending up in year 10 leaving school and ending up on heroin. Granted, I have made good and I did well in university and I'm at law school now, but I wouldn't wish my 15 - 18 years on anyone. It's incredibly hard if his schedule makes it difficult to get to classes on time, but he'll be punished anyway. Not only is it unfair, it messes up the conditioning that parents try so hard to instil in their children (behave well, rewards... behave badly, punishment). It sounds like it's very rough on him at the moment. Medication might be the answer, or it might not. What is important, from a legal perspective (speaking with my law student hat on), the school has a "duty of care". Punishing him for something he has no control over will cause, in a reasonably foreseeable way, mental distress and injury. It is not fair, right or proper for them to say "It's only detention, it's only an hour". When a child is a good student particularly, as your son clearly is, being punished for something out of their control is damaging and inappropriate. It's worthwhile making clear to the school that you won't hesitate to do whatever's in your son's best interests, including involving a lawyer and filing suit, or getting the local media involved. He sounds like a very talented young guy, he deserves the best chance in life. All I can say is do whatever you have to to support him in staying at school every day; I know it might be much more of an effort and impost on trying to juggle all your responsibilities, but I can assure you it will pay dividends. Hope it all works out ' Rumpole (Disclaimer : This is not legal advice, please seek advice from a licenced attorney in your state before proceeding in respect of threatening legal action or commencing legal action) [/QUOTE]
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school problem we never had before ( sorry, longer than I thought)
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