School Starts Tomorrow (or Soon).

HMBgal

Well-Known Member
Anyone else in a state of pure dread? It was so nice not getting the calls from school, the homework meltdowns, the drama, for eight weeks. And Difficult Child (grandson) is in school from 8:30-3:25 this year. I have no idea how he's going to maintain. Or the teacher. Or the principal.
 

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
There were many years I did dread it (especially when he was around your son's age)but this year I am excited for difficult child! He graduated but is still in high school for three more years working on job skills and independent living skills. I think he is going to love it, plus he is bored right now around the house!

I hope this year goes better than you are expecting HMBgal!!
 

HMBgal

Well-Known Member
Day one: ADHD Mom (my daughter) doesn't wake up to her phone alarm because A: it's dead, and two B: she didn't plug it in. So, my super anxious grandson and his sister are 40 minutes late on their first day. Meanwhile, Difficult Child's father and his new wife and 4 other kids (all hers, 1 of his, hers all by different men), are there taking notes for the courts in the upcoming custody hearing. Perfect. Good news: super anxious Difficult grandson could have cared less. He was morose and horribly upset yesterday, but happy and appropriately nervous, as all the kids were. He's on his way to us now, so I'm dying to find out how Day 1 went. Bigger class, lots more kids, longer day, on a new medication (Strattera--uhhhhh, I dunno about this one), so fingers, eyes, legs, feet, toes, ears, firmly crossed that today went well.
 

HMBgal

Well-Known Member
Day 6. Suspended for tomorrow. Crap on a cracker but I'm tired of this. On the positive side, all the hard work we did over the summer was apparent to the principal. But he made the wrong person mad with his language and disrespect (the only male teacher on the whole campus, told some fifth grade boys that he thought this teacher was a m** F**. When the boys told the teacher what Difficult Child had said, he was really angry and threatened to "drag you to the office." Um yeah. This kid has a horrible relationship with his emotionally abusive father, so you know that went well. Sigh.

At least he didn't hit anybody or tear up the school. That's big. He did swing his now-forbidden tablet at me and hit me in the leg when I tried to take it away from him once we got home, but it felt different than before because he reined himself in very quickly and started crying saying that he didn't mean to really hit me. And he accepted his consequences with more maturity than I've ever seen from him before. His anxiety level is down and that is making a definite difference. He also has a truly amazing teacher who really understands him so his days at school in general are going better than last year because she is prepared for him and is very observant, young, sweet, and energetic. We'll see if it's durably better or it's just a honeymoon.

He tries so hard and he disappoints himself, which cause anxiety which causes the other bad stuff. Trying to find interventions to break this cycle is so hard and proving to be slow going.
 
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Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
I'm so sorry about the suspension but it sounds like there are definitely some improvements happening!
 

HMBgal

Well-Known Member
I'm so sorry about the suspension but it sounds like there are definitely some improvements happening!

Thanks, Wiped Out. That's what I have to focus on. The progress can be so slow, but we have to be okay with that and not get discouraged. Poor kid, he's also getting teased unmercifully because of his previous behaviors and he says he has no friends and that no one likes him. He has been scary in the past, so I get it. I don't know at what point we change schools for a fresh start. I know there's no such thing as a "geographic cure" and that we take our baggage with us, especially as adults. But with kids? I don't know. This school is known for having a tough culture and not enough supervision out on the playground. Recess and lunch is when this always happens. Always. They know it and can't seem to intervene effectively.
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
he reined himself in very quickly and started crying saying that he didn't mean to really hit me. And he accepted his consequences with more maturity than I've ever seen from him before. His anxiety level is down and that is making a definite difference.
Yes, you ARE making a difference. It's just that for "our" kids, it's 10x the effort for half the results. Glad the school is recognizing the difference too. Too bad there's one bad apple in the lot... always at least one in my experience. Schools are made up of people, too - and they cross the full spectrum of people behaviors. It isn't just "our" kids!
 
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