School switch not likely to happen...

[gcvmom]

In May, we applied to transfer difficult child 2 to the local GATE magnet in hope of giving him a fresh start with his social skills since most of his problems in school came from his impulsive behavior with other kids and their bullying of him. He's got a reputation now and once that starts, it's hard to shake.

Despite being "told" he had a spot at the new school, it's not looking good, as the district has sent me two letters indicating and then reaffirming that he is on a wait list that is not likely to change.

For me, it's not such a bad thing since I won't have to start over with a new administration who does not know us or his history (he's been at his home school since kindergarten), and I won't have three separate school schedules to keep. I know that's selfish.

For him, it's disappointing because he really, really wanted to get away from certain kids at his home school. And even though he was in a GATE cluster at his home school, I think he was bored.

A friend who works at our home school has said I could push for this placement and probably get it. I don't know if that's true or not, and frankly, I don't feel an overwhelming urge to fight for this -- is that weird?

I emailed our principal this week to let her know about the situation and to ask who his teachers will be so I can draft a letter to drop off next week. I'm also thinking I need to update the IEP team on his current status. He's supposed to have an Alphasmart, but the home school was deferring to the new school to order that. With impulsivity being such a problem in the afternoon, I don't know how well he'll be able to function through the end of the school day, let alone how he will manage with homework.

So many variables and unknowns. I'm trying not to obsess about it. I just really want him to have a better experience than he's had in the past two years.

 

[TerryJ2]

What a mixture of emotions.
I'm so sorry it doesn't seem to be happening with-the school.
Yes, it IS hard to shake the reputation thing. So sorry.
It sounds like it's going to be a lot of work for him this yr. I wish I had some advice to offer.

 

[Wiped Out]

I'm sorry for difficult child that he didn't get into the school he was hoping for but it sounds like for you it's not an all bad thing. Also, I don't think you are being selfish-3 separate schedules would be crazy.

 

[gcvmom]

Thanks Terry and Sharon

The principal called me this afternoon. Said she was looking forward to him coming back and that since they ALL know him, she agreed that is a plus in his favor. Not that the other school's principal would have been bad, but that it could take a whole year for him to really understand difficult child 2 -- and that certainly won't help.

She's going to look critically at his homeroom placement to make sure he's not in a situation where his known antagonizers are all with him. She feels the teachers he'll have will be very good for him, too. They also want to get him involved in some activities that support his social skills training -- I guess I learn more about that next week. Then on Friday the 5th, the IEP team will meet to review his first week and discuss his current needs.

So overall, I feel pretty good about it. Although he's disappointed about not getting into the other school, he's excited about the new teachers, especially since one is the father of a boy who he knows from class last year and who is also a neutral to positive force in the past.

I was also able to ask about easy child/difficult child 3's placement -- her state testing came in just short of qualifying for GATE, but she'll most likely be put in the cluster group with high achievers, which pleases me very much.