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Selfish...
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<blockquote data-quote="zaftigmama" data-source="post: 513190" data-attributes="member: 13038"><p>I have no idea what your childrens' particular issues are, but I do know that kids in general tune us out if there's too much nagging going on. But the birthday was something really important, and if they refused to do anything I would have done it for them and lied to spare my grandfather's feelings. You feel this need more acutely because he's paying the bills--yes, the kids should be grateful too but they're kids--so naturally more effort should come from you. Their bills get paid whether it's mom, dad, grandma, it's all the same to them. Your kids are still young enough that they don't fully understand--be glad they don't--it means you've been able to protect them from the financial upheaval that accompanies divorce.</p><p></p><p>And this:</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>It's totally understandable that you're frustrated, but you can't say this kind of stuff to your daughter. Vent here, vent to a friend, a journal, scream into a pillow, but don't bash your ex to your kids, even if he deserves it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="zaftigmama, post: 513190, member: 13038"] I have no idea what your childrens' particular issues are, but I do know that kids in general tune us out if there's too much nagging going on. But the birthday was something really important, and if they refused to do anything I would have done it for them and lied to spare my grandfather's feelings. You feel this need more acutely because he's paying the bills--yes, the kids should be grateful too but they're kids--so naturally more effort should come from you. Their bills get paid whether it's mom, dad, grandma, it's all the same to them. Your kids are still young enough that they don't fully understand--be glad they don't--it means you've been able to protect them from the financial upheaval that accompanies divorce. And this: It's totally understandable that you're frustrated, but you can't say this kind of stuff to your daughter. Vent here, vent to a friend, a journal, scream into a pillow, but don't bash your ex to your kids, even if he deserves it. [/QUOTE]
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