Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Seriously Sick of this Saga
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 113604" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Agree again, Sara.</p><p>Honestly, I think lots of us tend to think our kids are "bad" when they are sick. I read stuff like "he's emotionally abusing me" and wonder if he's doing it because he's mean and rotten or if he's sick, and I usually think it's because the child is sick. Maybe (like I said) I'm a softie, but I think that this atypical behavior is usually due to severe mental illness or substance abuse. I'm tougher on the substance abuse because enabling a user can be worse than offering a warm and fuzzy place to use (in my opinion). But if somebody is mentally ill or has Aspergers/autism and obviously has no idea how to live in the real world (and maybe never WILL have that ability) then it's cruel in my opinion to throw them out with nowhere for them to go. in my opinion some are too quick to call the police when it won't help because the kids are very sick--I can see calling if it will lead to placement or psychiatric or neurological support, but not if it will lead to a police record or jail. I really think we have to look at our children's disabilities before we make decisions. Calling the police for a drug abuser may work whereas calling the police on an out-of-control autistic child most likely won't work. It's true that the "real" world won't care about our children's disabilities. That's why, in some cases, our kids really are not equipped to live independently in the "real" world. That's why assisted living apartments and group homes exist--for those adults who need a bit of help with the real world. Some grow up much later and some have disabilities that inhibit them from ever being able to live a totally dependent life and, in my opinion, that isn't the end of the world. To me, untreated mental illness and autism is the end of the world--and those of us who try to force our kids to act like they don't have these problems. Sometimes we have to alter what we want for our children. The child in question here, although seventeen, sounds very atypical and unready to live alone. Will he ever be able to? Time will tell. Depends on what's wrong and if he gets the proper help--even then NOBODY knows. When we give advice, we should remember that all kids are different. I forget myself sometimes. Shame on me (and I'm serious).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 113604, member: 1550"] Agree again, Sara. Honestly, I think lots of us tend to think our kids are "bad" when they are sick. I read stuff like "he's emotionally abusing me" and wonder if he's doing it because he's mean and rotten or if he's sick, and I usually think it's because the child is sick. Maybe (like I said) I'm a softie, but I think that this atypical behavior is usually due to severe mental illness or substance abuse. I'm tougher on the substance abuse because enabling a user can be worse than offering a warm and fuzzy place to use (in my opinion). But if somebody is mentally ill or has Aspergers/autism and obviously has no idea how to live in the real world (and maybe never WILL have that ability) then it's cruel in my opinion to throw them out with nowhere for them to go. in my opinion some are too quick to call the police when it won't help because the kids are very sick--I can see calling if it will lead to placement or psychiatric or neurological support, but not if it will lead to a police record or jail. I really think we have to look at our children's disabilities before we make decisions. Calling the police for a drug abuser may work whereas calling the police on an out-of-control autistic child most likely won't work. It's true that the "real" world won't care about our children's disabilities. That's why, in some cases, our kids really are not equipped to live independently in the "real" world. That's why assisted living apartments and group homes exist--for those adults who need a bit of help with the real world. Some grow up much later and some have disabilities that inhibit them from ever being able to live a totally dependent life and, in my opinion, that isn't the end of the world. To me, untreated mental illness and autism is the end of the world--and those of us who try to force our kids to act like they don't have these problems. Sometimes we have to alter what we want for our children. The child in question here, although seventeen, sounds very atypical and unready to live alone. Will he ever be able to? Time will tell. Depends on what's wrong and if he gets the proper help--even then NOBODY knows. When we give advice, we should remember that all kids are different. I forget myself sometimes. Shame on me (and I'm serious). [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Seriously Sick of this Saga
Top