she actually had good day

Jena

New Member
hi,

was going to go to Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) but wasn't ready just yet. my little one actually had calmest day she's had in long time. i was so happy for her. she made a friend with another little girl who has extreme anxiety but alot more functional than my little angel and they were on swings today at recess. she smiled from ear to ear when she told me. ahhh so worth the bad moments when you get to have a good one. only one nurse visit she's working through the anxiety while in the classroom. she's an amazing little person my baby she really is. i keep pushing and she keeps going. she needed today bigtime. she was overdue.

so columbia univesity's going to do her evaluation. did i mention it's going to cost about 10k?? LOL.....isn't ath funny? anyway full pyshc and neuro psychiatric evaluation. but team of them. roughly two or three days straight in city with full days of testing. they called me yesterday adn said they'd work with me on payment i was so so so relieved. they were the ones that i wanted. my heart's telling me this will be it the final answer god willing.

i called my ex nightmare to ask if he'd help me and ofcourse he was just so so willing......LOL......he said a few choice words on phone to me. so i said ok then i'm going to have my office draw up a doctor of which you'll sign stating that any reimbursement chks that comes are to be signed over to me. he refused to even that. so i told him that he'd better do the right thing unless he wants me to go pyscho.

so i'm going to try to get to office as often as i can and save as much out of chk as i can towards down payment then i figure i can file taxes and rapid it and use that as well. i depleted savings last year as much of you know.

i had to talk to the boyfriend to see if he would well let's just say make some "well needed" changes and also understand that he has to continue to float the bills alone while i go through this. so he's agree to join me in counseling to learn how to deal with me and more importantly him better. he's asked me not to pick hot topics infront of kids and to hold off until their sleeping or until our date night where we can discuss them openly and rationally without kids with us. i agreed.

so i think he's trying we shall see. i'm going to take it all one day at a time i started jumping into viewing it weeks at time and overloaded horribly yesterday which really scared me. but i'll tell you just knowing that xanax was in my bag today while i was on lirr helped keep me in check.

i'm really hoping i;m doing the right thing here and on the right path with all of it. i need good things now we deserve it. i'm tired.

thanks for listening
jen

hope everyones well
 
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