she got suspended

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Oct 27, 2008.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member


    So, I had mtg. this morning with my older daughter's teacher and her dean. She was disrespectful last Friday in class to her teacher, and was removed from class due to it, than continued to make a scene in the hallway with her friends and security was called.

    She was infact disrespectful to the teacher, lied to me with the version she gave me of what had occured last week. She totally played me last Friday with her "mom please believe me i wasn't nasty or disrespectful". That's why after thinking about it further I knew she wasn't telling me the truth to some extent.

    Long story short she got an in house suspension today. She cried yet was actually disrespectful to the teacher throughout the meeting and I had to plant her during the mtg somewhat.

    So, hopefully this will teach her a lesson we shall see what she does from here on out. She was told that if she has one more incident similar to this she will be suspended for a week outside of school. She has never had a behavioral issue in school at all, so being there is no history of it I am hoping the strong action taken by the school will wake her up.

    The dean said to me upon leaving (she's great by the way totally like her and her approach) your daughter's a beautiful girl, just look at her so all the boys' as well as girls are flocking towards her hence the focus on her social life. I said well that being what it is there is no excuse for her behavior. So, here's hoping :)
  2. I hope this works too. It's hard to see a kid who has never really been a problem all of a sudden making wrong choices.
  3. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh I'm so sorry. I hope this wakes her up. My difficult child go suspended also at that age, I can't even remember what it was for she had so many detentions that year. I know that schools will not tolerate disrespect and they shouldn't, so that will always draw a suspension. My difficult child was never disrespectful to her teachers but she bordered on it for a time. Hopefully your difficult child will outgrow it.

    What are the kids like that she hangs with? Often this kind of behavior is done to be part of the group or get attention from friends. That age was a very difficult time for us.

  4. Jena

    Jena New Member


    Thanks both of you for the support. Nancy actually her friends are really nice, and academically do incredibly well in school. She is the blacksheep of the bunch. She also has never been diagnosis with anything or at all or even taken for an evaluation. there was never a reason.

    With her it is total lack of interest in anything other than her friends, and the drama she can create in school. it's a difficult time.

    Very upsetting she is capable of so much more. I hope she learns, yet academically she isn't even doing well.
  5. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    In school suspensions are really boring, according to Miss KT, who has been there many a time. Hopefully your daughter will catch on after this first time, and tone herself down. Good luck!
  6. Jena

    Jena New Member


    Hopefully, yet truth is she makes me just shake my head. She truly does. She came home today before us with the kids and she dropped bags and decided to walk to 7 eleven to go and get nachos. Shes grounded, yet she picks up and walks off with her friends. NO phone call, no note just takes off after a mtg like that today.

    Than I start the calls the friends, their houses, etc. 40 min later she comes popping in the door all smiles and laughing like life is good. Is she kidding me? Wow is all i can say.
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member


    My difficult child's friends are all really good kids too. That is the best thing you have going for you. In our case her friends all banded together and stopped talking to her and called me to alert me what was going on. It was a very rough time there for about a month because she had no friends and nothing to do and I was terrified she would graviate toward th ebad crowd. But she finally realized if she wanted her friends back she had to change.

    I want to suggest something that may be all wrong but you should watch for. When my daughter acted that way, left angry and came home happy, she was smoking pot and drinking. The only way I knew she was using pot was that she was all happy and smiling, there were no other symptoms. It never got real bad because we intervened strongly but it could have gone downhill drastically. I would suspect her change in mood so quickly.

    Are there any of her friends that you can talk to in confidence to see if they can give you any info?

  8. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I hope the inschool suspension helps. Teenagers-ugh! Hugs.
  9. Jena

    Jena New Member


    Thanks for thinking of that, yet i already drug tested her. I do it randomly actually. I tell her it's a necessary blood test, and i take her to peds for it. She;s clean each time i do it.

    Truthfully she's just nasty and disrespectful, and she still thinks she did nothing wrong in school. I think part of the problem her frustration is she's not a student, she is capable of a's yet she doesn't want them she has no interest in that at all. So, she looks at her other friends with whom are interested in academics and she does just enough to get by in most classes. I'm giong to offer her a vocational school i think for next year. She can be taken out for a few hours each day and learn a trade then return to high school at some point during day.

    She doesn't want to do this, yet she isn't doing well where she is. What she is interested in for some reason does not view it as a good thing to do. She's interested in hair/make up/ fashion, she's actually very good at it. I said anythinig you do that makes you happy is great.

    Yet at the end of the day disrespect is just that. I don't tolerate that well at all. So now she gets punished and called on her bad behavior each time she does it.

    ugh......... teenagers are alot of fun. Personally i think they should be shipped off at age 13 and brought back at age 18 when maybe just maybe they'll like us again.

    LOL :)