She started her new job yesterday

[Nancy]

The sports bar/grill had their VIP opening last evening for managers and owners friends and family and she worked and got $170 in tips. husband and I went to the VIP event for workers friends and family Friday evening and got to meet her bosses and the owner who were very nice. It's a very nice place, lots of really big tv screens, live music, really good food and every kind of beer you could want. She said everyone is very friendly and the boss said he doesn't want any drama and wants everyone to get along and if not they wil be fired. It turns out that one of the owners is the uncle of a friend of hers from hs and she had his table last night and they loved her and gave her $120 tip. But of course all the jobs she's has started out with everyone liking her.

It opens officially tomorrow and she should get her schedule sometime today. They have this cell phone app for their schedule, it comes on their phone and so they always have it with them, great idea.

I was a bit worried last night because she deactivated her facebook account. Claims she was annoyed with some jerk. Then she asked me to block two numbers today from her phone. She's hiding from someone. They are cell numbers so I'm sure it's some guy. Honestly it must be hard to always have to look over your shoulder.

I hope she can keep this job and start paying her past due bills.

Nancy

 

[Calamity Jane]

Nancy,
Sounds like a great job for difficult child, and I'm glad she made a boatload of tips already. It was also very nice of her to invite you to the pre-opening friends and family event. I sincerely hope she makes good money, saves it, and inches closer and closer to self sufficiency and the reduction of interpersonal drama. Keeping my fingers crossed...it really sounds like a perfect job for her.

 

[recoveringenabler]

Nancy, here's hoping your difficult child keeps this job and pays all her back bills and becomes independent...........keeping my fingers crossed...........

 

[Kathy813]

Well, Nancy, you know what I always say . . . a working difficult child is a good thing!!

I think it is great that you and husband went to the family night opening. I'm sure that your difficult child appreciated your being there.

~Kathy

 

[Signorina]

I hope this is a good shot of confidence, i love that she included you in the family night and I am really crossing fingers!

 

[PatriotsGirl]

Great news!! Got everything crossed this works out for her!!

 

[dashcat]

Hoping she hangs in there, Nancy. Sounds like great earning potential. I truly believe a job is a first step in gaining a feeling of self-worth. This one sounds steady and I hope it provides for her what she needs. RE: the blocking and looking over their shoulder....boy, I sure know all about that one. Like yours, mine is often hinding from some person or situation..usually created by her own drama. I think a long of not good things happen on Facebook ...especially in the lives of our difficult children. Being deactivated for awhile might lessen the drama in her life. Here's hoping...
Dash

 

[toughlovin]

I think it is great that she is workinig and I think it is good that even though she loses jobs she always seems to get another one.... those are steps in the right direction!!!

TL

 

[Nancy]

No kidding TL, the fact that she seems to be able to get jobs so easily flies flat in the face of the uemployment crisis that is going on.

 

[PatriotsGirl]

No kidding TL, the fact that she seems to be able to get jobs so easily flies flat in the face of the uemployment crisis that is going on.

I have a hard time believing the "crisis", too. My husband's company cannot get enough people hired for the work they have (it is so bad my husband has to scale back getting new customers because they can't handle more work!) and my company is ALWAYS hiring all over the country...I think a lot of people don't want to work certain jobs. My husband claims that people have been bringing in so much in benefits that they don't want to go back to work because they feel it is not worth it to them. Don't know how much I believe that one, but I personally don't know many people out of work right now that don't want to be...

Everyone at difficult child's sober living place works except for her and she will be off restriction soon to find a job. They seem to think she will find one really quick, too. difficult child is desperate to work - she has a speeding ticket that she needs to pay and we will not pay it for her.

 

[AmericanGirl]

Nancy,

crossing my fingers with you!!

let's hope whoever she is avoiding is someone you wouldn't want her around anyway...which is probably the case.

 

[InsaneCdn]

PG... that employment crisis? It's real. But not consistent. (we have issues here too)
There's only two kinds of companies that are continuously looking for staff. One is for highly trained professionals - whether medical, technical, legal, whatever. It takes time to produce those, and there's usually a shortage. The other is for bottom-end labour, stuff just above minimum wage, with almost no benefits. TONS of those jobs available. And... while I'm not out of work at this point, I don't qualify for either of those camps, so if I end up out of work... there's no where to go. Working for min wage is worse than selling out and living on the proceeds if we have to... because we'd have to sell out anyway. (we don't have the housing crisis, so that is an option) Min wage - if all FOUR of us worked full time - wouldn't begin to pay the bills.

 

[exhausted]

I hope she hangs in there and pays bills too! I hope she she doesnt get in trouble spending her
money on drink and drugs. Fingers crossed. My difficult child takes her FB account down at times but then it goes back up
after a crisis has past. Never any idea what she avoids...cant see much because she has taken me off friend.

 

[Nancy]

Well she is up to her old tricks. Overslept and was late for work. I tried texting her a couple times to ask how the night before went but when she finally answered at 11:30 I asked why she wasn't at work. She thought she didn't go in until 4. So here it is not even a week on the new job and she is already in trouble. She will probably get fired because they overhired to see who will work out. She posted a picture of herself and some guy who had his hands all over her at a bar the night before, I think it was the one she works at. No she won't have this job very long.

 

[lovemysons]

Oh Nancy...I so wish your difficult child would stick with what works and keep moving forward....and really value the gifts/opportunities that come her way.

I hope she doesn't get fired.
LMS

 

[pasajes4]

My son is doing a long term study on kids who are engaging in deliquent behavior. The study is for ten years so no results, but one of the psychiatrists shared some information with me. In part of the study the kids are wired up while sitting at a computer that then shows various situations the control group (kids who have good grades, good friends, good behavior) are doing the same thing. When difficult children see videos of kids engaged in deliquent behavior, their brain waves go off the charts. The control groups remain the same. The psychiatrist said that it pretty much indicates that these kiddos really are hard wired to seek out/create the situations that they find themselves in.


Now if they could just find away to turn it off, maybe our kiddos would not be living lives that are in constant crisis mode.

 

[buddy]

That's interesting Pasa, I didn't see the episode but did look up the references after a Dr. Phil show for people with severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) including aggressive behaviors was shown. They had a dr. who used transcranial magnetci stimulation therapy after doing a functional map of the "hot" spots and under active spots in the brain that would help calm things....let me see if I can find it....

http://www.smartbrainandhealth.com/

I found that mayo clinic is using it but seems it is only for depression here, but this place is using it to treat many conditions that have identifiable functional problems on the brain scans.

It would be so interesting to be able to have many of our kids go through that kind of testing even if only to see how their brains really are wired and work.