shorter school days

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Ktllc, Oct 13, 2011.

  1. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    V's therapist advised me to arrange a shorter school day for V. I explained how his anxiety was up the roof in the morning, how he cried he need to see Ms. T (therapist) righ away, not in a week and how he was when he came home after school. Basically, he keeps it somewhat together at school, but at a high cost for him and our family.
    It has been a week thathe does not go full time and I believe I already see some progress in his behavior.
    After I reassured him that I would pick him up after lunch, he did not even cried when I left! He was sad, said bye a 100 times but no tears or screaming.
    It is a little soon to draw conclusions but I feel good in my decision.
    I have actually been looking into homeschooling for next year. I am not decided on that but I want to explore the option.
    Does anyone know the curriculum "Oak meadow"? It is Waldorf inspired and seems like a good method for V: slow paced, very hands on, delayed academics until 2nd grade.
    We will see the devel. pediatrician. in November and proceed with genetic testing like he had advised us a few months back. Then, we weren't ready. I'm scared but I think any infomation is good even if we are already doing everything to help him. The more I look at V, his issues, etc. The more I believe Fragile X syndrome might be his problem (he does some physical characteristic).
    He is not retarded, but both husband and I realize that our little guy is not as brilliant as we thought he was.... :( He actually seems to be stalling. He does have a great personality but he just does not comprehend a lot.
    Sometimes, I want to tell him "wake up!", although I know it would not help.
    To me, sensory processing disorder (SPD) and potential Central Auditory Processing Disorder (CAPD) does not seem to explain everything. husband also think there is more to it but we are doing everything we can and I should not worry so much. How does he do that? not worry? LOL
    husband goes to me: hope for the best but be ready for the worst, it's all we can do...
  2. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    How old is V? Sounds like K or 1st?
  3. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    Nope, only 4. He will enter Kindergarten next year. He will turn 5 in May.
  4. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    So he's in preschool full days? Wow. I didn't even know they had those.

    Did you stay home with him for a while?
  5. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    He started preschool/daycare (whatever you want to call it) at 20months. He went 3 day a week until he turned 3.
    At 3 years old he went into Head Start and it is from 8.30am to 2.30pm. You have no choice, unless there are medical reasons.
    Mental health issues do justify a shorter day, that's why they let me do it.
    When he first started preschool at 20 months old, he never cried. He did not express any emotion outside of the house. His care givers used to say he was a rock. He would just stare at people and say nothing. That behavior lasted until he was almost 4. Now the anxiety about school is getting worst. It's like a switch has been turned on and he is getting overwhelmed by it.
  6. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    I had a quick look at the Oak Meadow site as I have an American friend in Marrakech who is homeschooling her children and she would be interested - sent the link to her.
    Cutting down your son's hours sounds completely right. He shouldn't have to be going through all this anxiety if he doesn't have to. Homeschooling would seem like a good option apart from the social aspect. Don't suppose there's any chance of him going to a Waldorf type school near you? They do well catering for special needs children.
    My son has been going to full-time school since he was three - unlike V, he seems to love it and thrive on it. I think he wants the social aspect and the structured activity... But I know if I changed school there'd be major anxiety and difficulty, at least at first. I do think that small school and class sizes are primordially important for these anxious kids. How big is V's preschool?
  7. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    There are 18 kids in his class and 2 teachers. My oldest who is in elementary has also a 9:1 ratio.
    We are in a rural area and that is very lucky.
    But still, it is overstimulating for him... really cannot blame the school structure though.
    As far as going to a different/alternative school there is none around us. We would have to be closer to a big city. And despite that our business would not allow that, city life would be a nightmare for V.
    Honestly, I like our local elementary school, my oldest son is doing great and LOVES it. But he also is ahead for his age and a real social bug. The perfect student for any teacher. What I wonder is how good they would be with a kid like V!
    And then, I also need to work. I work from home but it is really hard to focus, be on the phone, draw contracts and do accounting when there are little ones around. We would really have to think of the schedule and probably V going to work with husband every now and then so I could work in peace.
    We have 1 year to think about it.... and I guess the genetic testing will also affect our decision. It will help us get prepared for the future.
    I'm afraid that sooner or later the other kids will realize that V is different. I don't want him to suffer for things he has no control over.
    I have to think outside of the box. Ultimately, I want him to be happy. Shorter days seem to make him happy. Let's see if it lasts! lol
  8. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Ultimately, you want him to be able to cope well. If shorter days are part of learning to cope... THAT is positive.
    Happy comes from things going well...