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Should I Be Upset About This...?
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 494589" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Malika--</p><p></p><p>Yes, you are right. In the grand scheme of things (and compared to some things she has done in the past) this is really not a battle worth fighting.</p><p></p><p>Zaftigmama--</p><p></p><p>Yes - "short-sighted and dumb" is a good description</p><p></p><p>Buddy--</p><p></p><p>LOL! You're right! And I didn't even realize how much of this (I want this - now I want that) had been going on before I typed it all out here. Maybe if I had typed it all out beforehand I would have seen that the violin was just another in a long line of instruments difficult child just *had* to have...could have saved me the trouble.</p><p></p><p>Trinity--</p><p></p><p>I think you've hit the nail on the head! It's not the viola or the violin or even the money I spent on it - it's the lying and manipulation....AND the fact that I allowed myself to get s*cked in to yet another good story about how difficult child is headed in a positive direction.</p><p></p><p>Just like with StepTo2's daughter - it's not about the Triscuits....it's the deception.</p><p></p><p>Because truthfully, if difficult child had come to me in, say, six months...and said the exact same thing about no longer playing the viola or guitar since she had the violin - I probably wouldn't have felt badly about it. I might have even encouraged her to sell it to a new student just getting started in string intruments.</p><p></p><p>Just like if I had purchased a sweater as a gift - and it turned out that difficult child didn't like the color or the style...I could have returned it and not had a moment of upset.</p><p></p><p>Instead...the whole thing just feels rotten.</p><p></p><p></p><p>A few months ago, difficult child asked husband if she could have $$ to go buy DS a birthday gift. Well, husband was thrilled with this idea! He thought difficult child was being so thoughtful and generous wanting to buy a gift for her brother - he handed over the cash and dropped her off at the store. He was so proud...</p><p></p><p>until he picked her up. difficult child had spent the money on herself. She had a shopping bag full of makeup, hair accessories, and jewelry. </p><p></p><p>And yes, she did buy a gift for DS - she spent $0.99 on a bag of candy for him.</p><p></p><p>husband was furious....and difficult child couldn't understand why. After all, she explained, she had searched the WHOLE STORE (Walmart) and there was NOT A THING that DS would have wanted....so she bought some stuff for herself instead.</p><p></p><p>husband would never have given her the money if he knew she was just going to spend it on makeup...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 494589, member: 6546"] Malika-- Yes, you are right. In the grand scheme of things (and compared to some things she has done in the past) this is really not a battle worth fighting. Zaftigmama-- Yes - "short-sighted and dumb" is a good description Buddy-- LOL! You're right! And I didn't even realize how much of this (I want this - now I want that) had been going on before I typed it all out here. Maybe if I had typed it all out beforehand I would have seen that the violin was just another in a long line of instruments difficult child just *had* to have...could have saved me the trouble. Trinity-- I think you've hit the nail on the head! It's not the viola or the violin or even the money I spent on it - it's the lying and manipulation....AND the fact that I allowed myself to get s*cked in to yet another good story about how difficult child is headed in a positive direction. Just like with StepTo2's daughter - it's not about the Triscuits....it's the deception. Because truthfully, if difficult child had come to me in, say, six months...and said the exact same thing about no longer playing the viola or guitar since she had the violin - I probably wouldn't have felt badly about it. I might have even encouraged her to sell it to a new student just getting started in string intruments. Just like if I had purchased a sweater as a gift - and it turned out that difficult child didn't like the color or the style...I could have returned it and not had a moment of upset. Instead...the whole thing just feels rotten. A few months ago, difficult child asked husband if she could have $$ to go buy DS a birthday gift. Well, husband was thrilled with this idea! He thought difficult child was being so thoughtful and generous wanting to buy a gift for her brother - he handed over the cash and dropped her off at the store. He was so proud... until he picked her up. difficult child had spent the money on herself. She had a shopping bag full of makeup, hair accessories, and jewelry. And yes, she did buy a gift for DS - she spent $0.99 on a bag of candy for him. husband was furious....and difficult child couldn't understand why. After all, she explained, she had searched the WHOLE STORE (Walmart) and there was NOT A THING that DS would have wanted....so she bought some stuff for herself instead. husband would never have given her the money if he knew she was just going to spend it on makeup... [/QUOTE]
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