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Should I step in or back off...
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<blockquote data-quote="donna723" data-source="post: 71429" data-attributes="member: 1883"><p>I agree with all the others. Right now he's enjoying all the privileges of being an "adult" with none of the corresponding responsibilities that go along with being an adult. It looks like he didn't really "transition" to coming back home - he just jumped right back into his old life - he's just a little easier to get along with.</p><p></p><p>And if these "friends" he spends all his time with are same pot smoking bunch that he hung out with before, I'd be very concerned. Hard to believe that he could be around a bunch of dedicated pot smokers all the time, and not be at least tempted to go back to it. It would like a recovering alcoholic trying not to drink but still wanting to spend all his time with his old buddies back at the bar!</p><p></p><p>Too much free time on their hands with no structure and no responsibilities is not good for any kid! Even most kids who are going off to college in the fall work during the summer to earn extra money. Not too many get to spend the whole summer just hanging out. My kids both worked part time during high school and went right to full time after they graduated. My daughter saved up her money to help pay her nursing school tuition. My son worked from the time he was fifteen, bought his first vehicle, gas and insurance, and paid for all his little "extras" with his own money. The summer between his Junior and Senior years, he worked three jobs - one full time and two part time. Didn't hurt either one of them a bit! They both learned to be very responsible, they learned that there is no such thing as a "free lunch", that <em>someone</em> has to work hard for the money that buys all that stuff, and that they were expected to pull their own share of the load. That's being an "adult", not just coming and going as they pleased. And there were still rules while they were in MY house, just common courtesy, like letting me know if they were going to be late, so I wouldn't worry myself sick. When they behaved like responsible, mature adults, then I treated them as such, but not before!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="donna723, post: 71429, member: 1883"] I agree with all the others. Right now he's enjoying all the privileges of being an "adult" with none of the corresponding responsibilities that go along with being an adult. It looks like he didn't really "transition" to coming back home - he just jumped right back into his old life - he's just a little easier to get along with. And if these "friends" he spends all his time with are same pot smoking bunch that he hung out with before, I'd be very concerned. Hard to believe that he could be around a bunch of dedicated pot smokers all the time, and not be at least tempted to go back to it. It would like a recovering alcoholic trying not to drink but still wanting to spend all his time with his old buddies back at the bar! Too much free time on their hands with no structure and no responsibilities is not good for any kid! Even most kids who are going off to college in the fall work during the summer to earn extra money. Not too many get to spend the whole summer just hanging out. My kids both worked part time during high school and went right to full time after they graduated. My daughter saved up her money to help pay her nursing school tuition. My son worked from the time he was fifteen, bought his first vehicle, gas and insurance, and paid for all his little "extras" with his own money. The summer between his Junior and Senior years, he worked three jobs - one full time and two part time. Didn't hurt either one of them a bit! They both learned to be very responsible, they learned that there is no such thing as a "free lunch", that [i]someone[/i] has to work hard for the money that buys all that stuff, and that they were expected to pull their own share of the load. That's being an "adult", not just coming and going as they pleased. And there were still rules while they were in MY house, just common courtesy, like letting me know if they were going to be late, so I wouldn't worry myself sick. When they behaved like responsible, mature adults, then I treated them as such, but not before! [/QUOTE]
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