Should we make yearly or annual get togethers?
- Thread starter mstang67chic
- Start date
Fran
Former desparate mom
Whymemom, it is not unusual for some to talk about getting together and then back out at the last minute. I suspect a few members have the same thinking you do. That there will be disillusionment with familiarity. They habitually back out. I can almost count on it with every planned get together.
I'm not sure why some are afflicted with that thinking. Personally, I don't have expectations that anyone has to be a role. You have to be sincere, truthful, kind and a bit of a sense of humor to be appreciated as a human being and warrior mom. Anything else would be more important to you than it is to someone like me.
I would hope that these get togethers provide a sense of commraderie and connection more than a pagent by which one is judged by others.
I have been fortunate to have traveled a good bit as site owner and met many of the members in many parts of the US. I never once thought "gee, she was a disappointment." "gee, she was not as charming as I would have thought" "gee she isn't as attractive as she seemed". Maybe because the inner beauty is what I look for and usually find in each of the warrior mom's and dad's I have met.
I would never miss an opportunity to connect to another parent who is struggling because of fear that they could see through my facade.
I hope you reconsider and come to a get together with no expectations.
Now if you are a 27 yr old man with no difficult child who likes to play "make believe" into a cd.com member then I might not think too much of you. Other than that, anything goes.
After rereading I may have misunderstood Whymemom's concerns. Originally, I thought it was because she thought we would be disappointed but if I read it correctly the second time, it's a privacy thing. Sorry if I mis understood.
I'm not sure why some are afflicted with that thinking. Personally, I don't have expectations that anyone has to be a role. You have to be sincere, truthful, kind and a bit of a sense of humor to be appreciated as a human being and warrior mom. Anything else would be more important to you than it is to someone like me.
I would hope that these get togethers provide a sense of commraderie and connection more than a pagent by which one is judged by others.
I have been fortunate to have traveled a good bit as site owner and met many of the members in many parts of the US. I never once thought "gee, she was a disappointment." "gee, she was not as charming as I would have thought" "gee she isn't as attractive as she seemed". Maybe because the inner beauty is what I look for and usually find in each of the warrior mom's and dad's I have met.
I would never miss an opportunity to connect to another parent who is struggling because of fear that they could see through my facade.
I hope you reconsider and come to a get together with no expectations.
Now if you are a 27 yr old man with no difficult child who likes to play "make believe" into a cd.com member then I might not think too much of you. Other than that, anything goes.
After rereading I may have misunderstood Whymemom's concerns. Originally, I thought it was because she thought we would be disappointed but if I read it correctly the second time, it's a privacy thing. Sorry if I mis understood.
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mstang67chic
Going Green
WMM....I understand where you're coming from but hope that at least at some point, you would change your mind. I think all of us here, no matter our financial status, appearance or "social" status......don't really care about any of that and are just happy we have found others in the same boat who we can relate to and get along with. As for the annonymity...some of us here are more open and free with things such as our real names, where we live, etc. and some aren't. Neither side is a bad side, it's just what you are comfortable with. But whatever level of that you want, we all respect that and will abide by it.
Personally, I would love to meet as many people from here as possible because as good of friends as I have, you guys GET IT. I can vent, whine, moan and make jokes that others might think are wrong and you guys GET IT. Sometimes I do feel guilty because I'll read posts by others and be thankful that I don't have it that bad but that also helps me too. If that person can deal with THEIR situation, then surely I can handle mine. You know?
Anyhoo...what I'm trying to say is that I (we) understand. But at the same time, I hope you would consider going to a gathering at some point in the future. 'K?
Personally, I would love to meet as many people from here as possible because as good of friends as I have, you guys GET IT. I can vent, whine, moan and make jokes that others might think are wrong and you guys GET IT. Sometimes I do feel guilty because I'll read posts by others and be thankful that I don't have it that bad but that also helps me too. If that person can deal with THEIR situation, then surely I can handle mine. You know?
Anyhoo...what I'm trying to say is that I (we) understand. But at the same time, I hope you would consider going to a gathering at some point in the future. 'K?
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
I have wanted to back out of meeting folks here because I am nervous about what people here will think about the real me but then I just think...good lord, some of the older members have known me so long that I dont think I could even be a surprise. Nancy, Fran and Suz are practically family by now. They have been by my side through my bipolar diagnosis and medication trials. If that wasnt tough I dont know what is. Suz was willing to drop everything and run down to watch over my son when I couldnt get to him and he was in the hospital for testing. Luckily she didnt have to. He was ok but what a fantastic board auntie!
Sniff, sniff, sob. I just love this group.
Sniff, sniff, sob. I just love this group.
ThreeShadows
Quid me anxia?
Yeah, everyone was appalled at the behavior of our difficult children "they're so lucky to have been adopted by a physician and his wife, long marriage, they've been to Italy, Greece, France and a private academy!". I felt so guilty I had been complaining...Thank you all for understanding.
mstang67chic
Going Green
They/he/she is so lucky to have been adopted....they/he/she should be grateful you gave them a good, stable home.....etc.
You get those too?
OMG...those comments drive me nuts! I didn't adopt my son to have someone indebted to me....we adopted him because we wanted a child. Tourette's Syndrome, you have no reason to be guilty. Those comments.....at least to me....are right up there with the ones about how I should beat his backside, how I must be doing something wrong for him to act like that, how there is no such thing as ADHD or mental illness. GRRRRRRRRRRR....makes me want to slap people.
*looks around*
Erm....sorry....that had absolutely nothing to do with this thread did it?
You get those too?
OMG...those comments drive me nuts! I didn't adopt my son to have someone indebted to me....we adopted him because we wanted a child. Tourette's Syndrome, you have no reason to be guilty. Those comments.....at least to me....are right up there with the ones about how I should beat his backside, how I must be doing something wrong for him to act like that, how there is no such thing as ADHD or mental illness. GRRRRRRRRRRR....makes me want to slap people.
*looks around*
Erm....sorry....that had absolutely nothing to do with this thread did it?
mstang67chic
Going Green
Cleveland.
ThreeShadows
Quid me anxia?
OMG!OMG!OMG! Where's the hysterical smilie?
gcvmom
Here we go again!
I've reached out and met a couple of people in person that I've met through support groups like this. One was a mom with a son who has Crohn's like my difficult child 1. I was really nervous, but we met at Legoland with all our kids one summer and I kept telling myself it was to benefit both difficult child 1 and me. I wanted him to know someone else who had to deal with the same weird health problems he had. And I wanted to personally meet this person who had been so helpful to me during a very stressful time in my life during difficult child 1's diagnosis.
The other person I met was TM, last winter at Disneyland... again, with kids in tow. And perhaps it was for selfish reasons, but I was very excited to meet someone who understood what life is like with a difficult child.
I am so very glad I was able to meet these people face-to-face. And the fact that we already have so much in common does something to establish a connection that doesn't happen as quickly with someone you meet off the street.
I am really, really looking forward to meeting everyone in the next few days. And I will surely look forward to future opportunities to meet the other people who come here every day to pour their heart out and share their pain, their hope and encouragement with eachother. You all have given me a strength and a resilience that can only come from others who have walked a similar path.
The other person I met was TM, last winter at Disneyland... again, with kids in tow. And perhaps it was for selfish reasons, but I was very excited to meet someone who understood what life is like with a difficult child.
I am so very glad I was able to meet these people face-to-face. And the fact that we already have so much in common does something to establish a connection that doesn't happen as quickly with someone you meet off the street.
I am really, really looking forward to meeting everyone in the next few days. And I will surely look forward to future opportunities to meet the other people who come here every day to pour their heart out and share their pain, their hope and encouragement with eachother. You all have given me a strength and a resilience that can only come from others who have walked a similar path.
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
Oh oh oh...I forgot! I did meet someone else off the board! And its funny I forgot this because Jamie was talking about this just the other day. There was this lady and I cant remember her name for love nor money but she lived not far from Charlotte NC. We met up with her at Carowinds back when all of our kids were in their mid teens. Jamie was probably 15 or 16, so Cory was 13 or 14 and her boy was right in there. It was mid summer and they all had a blast. We packed a picnic lunch and it was so fun. They even had a bungy jump thing that the boys remember so well.
busywend
Well-Known Member
I did not want to burst anyone's bubble, but I have seen many a gathering discussed that did NOT happen through the years. So, this one actually happening is a very pleasant surprise! I think it would be great to do this yearly! I could not make every trip, but when I could I certainly would!
