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Should've, would've, could've...
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 533205" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>You're a wise woman SuZir, I think wisdom and compassion are what we gain from our mistakes if we stay open, and you have. While reading your post, my granddaughter's best friend came to mind. She is a fraternal twin. She and her 'twin' sister don't even look like sisters at all, they look like they belong in different families altogether. One is rail thin, the other pudgy, one is SUPER smart, wants to be a Doctor, the other has to take remedial reading in school, the smart one is super popular, has tribes of friends while her sister is shy and withdrawn. One talks a mile a minute, the other is quiet and calm. Both of the girls are over our house a lot, they couldn't be more different, and yet, both are endearing, lovable and wonderful kids. I've known these girls since they were in the second grade and they're 16 now and all these years you can't help but think, how in the world did that happen????? The Dad favors one, the mom the other. They could not be more different looking or more different in personality and everything else. So, kids in the same family being so dissimilar in every way can be completely plausible. </p><p></p><p>In reaction to your comment, "it did hurt so many people" it sounds to me like it hurt you and husband, <strong>and he got over it. </strong></p><p> </p><p>If you think others are judging you, I think it would be prudent to remember that we react to the judgments of others to the exact degree that we are busy judging ourselves. My guess is that when you completely stop judging yourself for this "mistake" you won't be bothered to notice mother in law or anyone else's judgments. <em>What they think is none of your business. Hugs to you............</em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 533205, member: 13542"] You're a wise woman SuZir, I think wisdom and compassion are what we gain from our mistakes if we stay open, and you have. While reading your post, my granddaughter's best friend came to mind. She is a fraternal twin. She and her 'twin' sister don't even look like sisters at all, they look like they belong in different families altogether. One is rail thin, the other pudgy, one is SUPER smart, wants to be a Doctor, the other has to take remedial reading in school, the smart one is super popular, has tribes of friends while her sister is shy and withdrawn. One talks a mile a minute, the other is quiet and calm. Both of the girls are over our house a lot, they couldn't be more different, and yet, both are endearing, lovable and wonderful kids. I've known these girls since they were in the second grade and they're 16 now and all these years you can't help but think, how in the world did that happen????? The Dad favors one, the mom the other. They could not be more different looking or more different in personality and everything else. So, kids in the same family being so dissimilar in every way can be completely plausible. In reaction to your comment, "it did hurt so many people" it sounds to me like it hurt you and husband, [B]and he got over it. [/B] If you think others are judging you, I think it would be prudent to remember that we react to the judgments of others to the exact degree that we are busy judging ourselves. My guess is that when you completely stop judging yourself for this "mistake" you won't be bothered to notice mother in law or anyone else's judgments. [I]What they think is none of your business. Hugs to you............[/I] [/QUOTE]
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