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Sick over her attitude/values
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<blockquote data-quote="Anna1345" data-source="post: 100817" data-attributes="member: 4292"><p>She is 20. You have answered your own question.</p><p>You can't control her money, but you CAN control your money. It is not like she has a child involved who would suffer. Right now your difficult child is only hurting herself. Yes it is sad, we HATE seeing our children in a slow motion train wreck. However, you have given her all the tools and she CHOOSES to not use them.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Yes, you have every right to feel emotion about it. It is what makes you human and a mother. Does that mean you should act upon it and give in? Nope. She will learn the hard way. As for your second question as to why? I think they think it is the only thing they can really control. Up until now, parents have always controlled everything -- or at least attempted to. Now, it is her money, her job, her bills and no one will tell her when and how to use it or not use it. I believe it is a total control thing.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there, stay strong and remember, just because you are he mother and will always love her and care about her, DOESN'T mean you have to keep bailing her out. I know you already know this but bailing her out does NO help her. Giving her the fish never allows her to get her own food for the rest of her life. No matter how painful, it doesn't help them.</p><p></p><p>Stay strong and hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Anna1345, post: 100817, member: 4292"] She is 20. You have answered your own question. You can't control her money, but you CAN control your money. It is not like she has a child involved who would suffer. Right now your difficult child is only hurting herself. Yes it is sad, we HATE seeing our children in a slow motion train wreck. However, you have given her all the tools and she CHOOSES to not use them. Yes, you have every right to feel emotion about it. It is what makes you human and a mother. Does that mean you should act upon it and give in? Nope. She will learn the hard way. As for your second question as to why? I think they think it is the only thing they can really control. Up until now, parents have always controlled everything -- or at least attempted to. Now, it is her money, her job, her bills and no one will tell her when and how to use it or not use it. I believe it is a total control thing. Hang in there, stay strong and remember, just because you are he mother and will always love her and care about her, DOESN'T mean you have to keep bailing her out. I know you already know this but bailing her out does NO help her. Giving her the fish never allows her to get her own food for the rest of her life. No matter how painful, it doesn't help them. Stay strong and hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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Sick over her attitude/values
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