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Substance Abuse
Sigh! Friggin enablers!
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 549325" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>I'm with AG on this.</p><p></p><p>We've had to deal with some pretty extreme stuff, but... there are some things that never get taken away - at least, not as long as they are at home... and one of those is birthdays. (If he's in jail, then you can't - different story, Know what I mean??) Another is family vacations. Now, we might trim back - not because difficult child doesn't deserve to be loved and gifted as much as anyone else, but because he can't handle getting all the stuff at this point in time. But difficult child would get real presents - not "care packages", not clothes for school (unless it was a really cool shirt that he really wanted and we think is appropriate). And a birthday cake or special meal, even if it was only with family.</p><p></p><p>Stop and think about whether you are trying to punish him, or if these are logical consequences. Because... punishment backfires.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 549325, member: 11791"] I'm with AG on this. We've had to deal with some pretty extreme stuff, but... there are some things that never get taken away - at least, not as long as they are at home... and one of those is birthdays. (If he's in jail, then you can't - different story, Know what I mean??) Another is family vacations. Now, we might trim back - not because difficult child doesn't deserve to be loved and gifted as much as anyone else, but because he can't handle getting all the stuff at this point in time. But difficult child would get real presents - not "care packages", not clothes for school (unless it was a really cool shirt that he really wanted and we think is appropriate). And a birthday cake or special meal, even if it was only with family. Stop and think about whether you are trying to punish him, or if these are logical consequences. Because... punishment backfires. [/QUOTE]
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Sigh! Friggin enablers!
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