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The Watercooler
Since it's come up a lot lately, were you ever bullied in school?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 433173" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>The kid who was one of the worst bullies to difficult child 3, was himself bullied. When I went to complain to his mother, I raised that. I said, "I know you get bullied too, and it is not fair. But picking on difficult child 3 as a way to make yourself feel better, is not a good coping strategy. Beating him up is no glory. And he is no threat. Find a better way to deal with your own distress, maybe find a more productive way to make your own misery stop."</p><p></p><p>There were never any more problems with that kid. I also went out of my way to catch him out doing a good deed, and publicly praised him for it. At first he looked scared, he thought I was going to say something nasty. But after I saw him do something really generous on the sports field, I told him that I thought he was a really good sport and a very generous team player. I made it clear that I meant it, I described what I had seen and said it showed maturity and generosity of spirit.</p><p></p><p>That kid has since rescued difficult child 3, twice, from other kids hassling him.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 433173, member: 1991"] The kid who was one of the worst bullies to difficult child 3, was himself bullied. When I went to complain to his mother, I raised that. I said, "I know you get bullied too, and it is not fair. But picking on difficult child 3 as a way to make yourself feel better, is not a good coping strategy. Beating him up is no glory. And he is no threat. Find a better way to deal with your own distress, maybe find a more productive way to make your own misery stop." There were never any more problems with that kid. I also went out of my way to catch him out doing a good deed, and publicly praised him for it. At first he looked scared, he thought I was going to say something nasty. But after I saw him do something really generous on the sports field, I told him that I thought he was a really good sport and a very generous team player. I made it clear that I meant it, I described what I had seen and said it showed maturity and generosity of spirit. That kid has since rescued difficult child 3, twice, from other kids hassling him. Marg [/QUOTE]
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Since it's come up a lot lately, were you ever bullied in school?
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