Quick recap: gfg32 lives with girlfriend 1500 miles away and she gets restraining order. (Three girlfriend's in last ten years, third restraining order from each). He gets $$ from a friend and takes bus back here, unsettling hateful drama with us, he gets a friend's dad to pay his airfare back up there). Exgf is texting and calling, filling me in on unsavory details--he hasn't worked in a year, etc. (Etc. part is even worse). She finds out he is flying back up there and texts, I am soooooo stressed...don't know what to do. I reply, Don't meet him at the airport. There are probably other options. He asks my mom for airfare BACK down here. She Western Unions $250 with contingencies that he start going to church, turn to God, etc. He (an unbeliever) agrees. Yesterday, he and she exchange a volley of emails. He wants to be loved unconditionally, will not meet her demands (duh!), and will not return the $250. Today, she forwards at least six emails from gfg32. His ex(?)girlfriend's parents are giving him $250, on the condition that he have nothing further to do with his mentally ill family. The girlfriend is aghast that i would suggest she not meet him at the airport. He thinks he may change his last name. His dad and I are dead to him, he says....and he did WU the money back to his grandma. My mom is 83. I have shared wisdom from this board, and she seemed to be comforted by it. One of the LONG emails she forwarded to me was telling gfg32 how perhaps, his family failed him, he should forgive. It is his parent's role to instruct him way into adulthood and included some story in the bible where some guy died because he did not want to interfere in the lives of his adult children (seemingly, for the benefit of husband and me). I advised her twice to stop feeding gfg32 . Think she has stopped now (maybe) because last email she received from gfg32 told her to STOP contacting him. husband and I had some peace building this last week after a very emotional start, with moments of doubt, OK....but mostly much better each day. This has provided new angst, trouble sleeping last night. My mom means well, but never understands why her lectures, rich with biblical examples, do not work. I ALWAYS welcomed my parents' wisdom, she repeats. While husband and I do not think she has done long term harm, it is frustrating. I have left much out (and you must to keep it to just long and not a novel).