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General Parenting
So Angry at All the Lying, Stealing and Sneaking
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<blockquote data-quote="trinityroyal" data-source="post: 270212" data-attributes="member: 3907"><p>And this really is the key, isn't it. We want so badly to believe in them, that we keep letting down our guard, only to get burned over and over again.</p><p></p><p>To this day, we have key locks on just about every room of the house. husband's and my bedroom, my home office, the basement, Little easy child's bedroom. And we have a safe. And we have a double deadbolt on the garage.</p><p></p><p>difficult child hasn't lived in our home for nearly 2 years now, but the locks are all still in place. When he visits overnight, or even for a few hours, the whole house goes back into lockdown, and I carry the keys on a lanyard around my neck. It's horrible, but it's the reality. And when we visit him at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC), we STILL find things in his room that he's stolen from the house when he comes over.</p><p></p><p>A few years ago, I got to the point where I realized that I simply could not believe anything difficult child said. Unless I have independent proof to the contrary, I assume difficult child is either lying or mistaken, and then work from there. If he happens to be telling the truth and gets angry with me for not believing him, I calmly remind him that when 999 out of 1000 things are a lie, I can be forgiven for expecting the 1000th to be a lie as well.</p><p></p><p>Not ideal by any means, but it's part of my detachment and helps to keep me sane.</p><p></p><p>It really hoovers.</p><p></p><p>Trinity</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="trinityroyal, post: 270212, member: 3907"] And this really is the key, isn't it. We want so badly to believe in them, that we keep letting down our guard, only to get burned over and over again. To this day, we have key locks on just about every room of the house. husband's and my bedroom, my home office, the basement, Little easy child's bedroom. And we have a safe. And we have a double deadbolt on the garage. difficult child hasn't lived in our home for nearly 2 years now, but the locks are all still in place. When he visits overnight, or even for a few hours, the whole house goes back into lockdown, and I carry the keys on a lanyard around my neck. It's horrible, but it's the reality. And when we visit him at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC), we STILL find things in his room that he's stolen from the house when he comes over. A few years ago, I got to the point where I realized that I simply could not believe anything difficult child said. Unless I have independent proof to the contrary, I assume difficult child is either lying or mistaken, and then work from there. If he happens to be telling the truth and gets angry with me for not believing him, I calmly remind him that when 999 out of 1000 things are a lie, I can be forgiven for expecting the 1000th to be a lie as well. Not ideal by any means, but it's part of my detachment and helps to keep me sane. It really hoovers. Trinity [/QUOTE]
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So Angry at All the Lying, Stealing and Sneaking
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