This has been the weirdest ride with difficult child. Quick recap: He moved out a month ago (he's 16 yr. old) and moved in with girlfriend and her parents. Ugh. Has accused husband and I of almost every kind of abuse imaginable. This is after months of disrespect from him, and not following rules. Last Wednesday he wants to meet with me to talk so I go meet him and we have a good discussion about regrets, etc. and how and where we want to go from here. He says that he wants to come home at some point but wants to talk to his counsellor at school about whether it is a good idea for him to move back in before we get some family counselling. He seems very genuine, remorseful, caring, wants to work this out. Ok, so I leave it at that. Saturday/Sunday night at 1:30am I get an email from him saying things are stressful between difficult child and girlfriend, he thinks it would be better for his relationship with girlfriend and his relationship with us if he comes home asap. He also says his counsellor thought he should come home asap as well. So, I'm concerned but happy because I really do want this to work and we want him to come home and get himself together so he can have a good future. We take him and girlfriend out for dinner yesterday to talk about when he's coming home. Now he's decided, after discussing it with girlfriend, that he's going to come home on a 'trial basis' starting on Wednesday. But he's not going to come home on Wednesday until after he's hung out with his friends. Weird and manipulative, right? If he's only packing a backpack full of clothes and toiletries then he could have come home last night - so why leave it until Wednesday - makes no sense to me. I really don't like his attitude and now husband and I are starting to question why we want him back home so badly. The entire meal he was flippant, goofy, never asked about his sister (she stayed home because she was sick), never asked how any of the family was. He also admitted to stealing $5 of pledge money from his 30-hour famine pledge because he only needed $50 in pledges to do it and he had $55. Ugh. He thought it was funny - I think it is sick. I will never pledge this kid again - never getting money from me for anything. Every time I see or talk to him he makes sure I know he doesn't have any money. I just ignore him. The other night he asked husband and I to lend him some money so he could give girlfriends parents money for room and board. No. If husband and I decide to give the 'rescuers' any money it will go directly to them and he won't see it. I'm very leary. I have a suspicion he has some other plans and he is only coming home to bide his time until he can put his plans into place. He was still talking last week of getting his own place and moving in with difficult child friend. Since then I have discovered that he has another difficult child friend that is a foster child and is almost 18 - so when he turns 18 he'll have to get his own place. I checked his FB from his sister's account and there is still conversation going on about them getting a place together. difficult child friend #1 doesn't come back to the area until the end of June and the foster child doesn't turn 18 for several months. I have a feeling that girlfriends parents want him out because he eats too much and he's getting expensive (we haven't given them a dime), not to mention they are going through a divorce. He might just be coming home for a while until his difficult child friends get their acts together and they can try to find a place. They might have to wait until foster child turns 18 because the my difficult child and the other one are only 16 and can't legally sign a lease. I guess the reason we are having him home is because we want to try to make this work. Regardless of the outcome I want to be able to look back in 20 years and say I did everything I could to make this work with him and for him. Know what I mean?? So, husband and I have a plan. We will be calm and cool. We will allow him to suffer the natural consequences of most of his actions (i.e. don't go to school - you will fail). If his actions disturb the peace in our household (and it has been very peaceful the last month) then we will implement consequences. If he can't deal with that then he will have to go. We will continue the counselling for a while yet - with him and without him. Because we don't trust him we will also be letting him know that when we go to our RV park for the weekends he will either have to come with us or find somewhere to stay for the weekends. The only worry I have here is that if he starts spending weekends away from home this summer he will likely start using drugs or alcohol as well. To my knowledge he is not using (I had him drug tested about 7 weeks ago). How would you handle this?