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Substance Abuse
So confused
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 509751"><p>Boy have I lived with what you describe!!! I think one motivator for us in kicking my son out of our house was my younger daughter. It became clear to us that for her welfare we could not keep allowing all his shenanigans at home. It would have taken us longer if it had not been for her..... we did kick him out when he was 18 and he went and stayed with friends.... we did let him come back for a while after he did some real work to actually make things up so he could get his hs diploma. Then when he was breaking all the rules again we kicked him out again.... and things went downhill in many ways from there.</p><p></p><p>However I think the longer we avoided him really being on the streets and homeless the more he took advantage of the things we were willing to do for him.</p><p></p><p>However I really think getting to the point where you are willling to let your child be homeless and hungry is really tough and it is a process. I certainly did not get to that point overnight and I doubt anyone here did. So it is good to recognize you are not at that point yet. Keep thinking about your parameters and what you are willing to do for him and what you are not. Think about your needs and yourself... and if driving him to school every day is too hard for you then don't do it. He needs to do some hard work to figure out his life and it is his job to figure it out... asking for your guidance is fine (bet he is not doing that right now though) but it is his job to find his path.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 509751"] Boy have I lived with what you describe!!! I think one motivator for us in kicking my son out of our house was my younger daughter. It became clear to us that for her welfare we could not keep allowing all his shenanigans at home. It would have taken us longer if it had not been for her..... we did kick him out when he was 18 and he went and stayed with friends.... we did let him come back for a while after he did some real work to actually make things up so he could get his hs diploma. Then when he was breaking all the rules again we kicked him out again.... and things went downhill in many ways from there. However I think the longer we avoided him really being on the streets and homeless the more he took advantage of the things we were willing to do for him. However I really think getting to the point where you are willling to let your child be homeless and hungry is really tough and it is a process. I certainly did not get to that point overnight and I doubt anyone here did. So it is good to recognize you are not at that point yet. Keep thinking about your parameters and what you are willing to do for him and what you are not. Think about your needs and yourself... and if driving him to school every day is too hard for you then don't do it. He needs to do some hard work to figure out his life and it is his job to figure it out... asking for your guidance is fine (bet he is not doing that right now though) but it is his job to find his path. TL [/QUOTE]
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