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So, Do I Go Against Everything I Believe....
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 133731" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Lisa,</p><p> </p><p>I think you have taken a very wonderful stand on the babysitting for Darrin and Aubrey. It sounds like easy child and sister in law are doing their best to be good parents, and you are giving them a hand up. Key word is THEM. With Nichole, you would just be making it easy for boyfriend to bow out and use you as an excuse. You are insisting that they do what is appropriate - Nichole to fight for her child, and to do what needs to be done if she won't. Seems like the best parenting to me - each child gets what is needed/warranted with NO hangups about bean-counting. You know - You watched Darrin for 10 hours, you owe Aubrey 10 hours. </p><p> </p><p>I must say I really admire this. It is HARD to do. I think even harder with grandkids, but each is an individual.</p><p> </p><p>Hey, maybe we need IPPs or IGPs! Individual Parenting Plans or Individual Grandparenting Plans! It seems to be the best way to provide what each child needs to grow and learn.</p><p> </p><p>My mom went to grad school when I was in late elem school and jr high. It was tough, but she and my dad fought out who did what. You remind me of her. (I mean this in a wonderful way!) It is HARD to start over after the kids are grown. </p><p> </p><p>I have wondered about you and your husband. I can see why you want to wait until the schooling is done - and I agree with that being a very reasonable thing. It is really HARD to live with an Aspie (that is the AS in your sig, isn't it?) My own dad is an Aspie. He isn't as self-absorbed mostly. But he does totally NOT get that we are not always interested in what he is thinking about (When was the last time the temperature in lower Slobovnia was crucial as you prepped for, well, anything???)</p><p> </p><p>I hope that you get through school well, that your husband finally "gets it" that you read him like a book, and that you get an awesome career that pays well AND makes you feel good about life!</p><p> </p><p>Hugs,</p><p> </p><p>Susie</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 133731, member: 1233"] Lisa, I think you have taken a very wonderful stand on the babysitting for Darrin and Aubrey. It sounds like easy child and sister in law are doing their best to be good parents, and you are giving them a hand up. Key word is THEM. With Nichole, you would just be making it easy for boyfriend to bow out and use you as an excuse. You are insisting that they do what is appropriate - Nichole to fight for her child, and to do what needs to be done if she won't. Seems like the best parenting to me - each child gets what is needed/warranted with NO hangups about bean-counting. You know - You watched Darrin for 10 hours, you owe Aubrey 10 hours. I must say I really admire this. It is HARD to do. I think even harder with grandkids, but each is an individual. Hey, maybe we need IPPs or IGPs! Individual Parenting Plans or Individual Grandparenting Plans! It seems to be the best way to provide what each child needs to grow and learn. My mom went to grad school when I was in late elem school and jr high. It was tough, but she and my dad fought out who did what. You remind me of her. (I mean this in a wonderful way!) It is HARD to start over after the kids are grown. I have wondered about you and your husband. I can see why you want to wait until the schooling is done - and I agree with that being a very reasonable thing. It is really HARD to live with an Aspie (that is the AS in your sig, isn't it?) My own dad is an Aspie. He isn't as self-absorbed mostly. But he does totally NOT get that we are not always interested in what he is thinking about (When was the last time the temperature in lower Slobovnia was crucial as you prepped for, well, anything???) I hope that you get through school well, that your husband finally "gets it" that you read him like a book, and that you get an awesome career that pays well AND makes you feel good about life! Hugs, Susie [/QUOTE]
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So, Do I Go Against Everything I Believe....
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