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Parent Emeritus
So I finally kicked him out - why do I feel like ****?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 545820" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>HI JillS, I'm sorry, I know how hard it is. I hope you can find a good therapist to help your son with his abandonment issues. My difficult child, a full grown woman, had similar issues with her Dad who was never there for her. She seems to have created a life with abandonment at the core, everyone abandons her, and when all is said and done, from her perspective, so did I. She doesn't seem interested in therapy or helping herself, so after many years of trying to get her help, I set her up with all the therapists, social workers, social services help she could possibly get, but I'm not sure she will avail herself to that help. It is very sad. There is nothing more I can do, I had to let go. </p><p></p><p>Right now your son is safe, perhaps he will go to the therapist and get some clarity and insight and be able to move through this while you get a break. He doesn't sound like a bad kid, he has a conscience, he feels bad about stealing, he just seems lost. </p><p></p><p>I understand the guilt you feel about his Dad, I had a tough time with that too, but we didn't create that lack of connection. Your son has to find his own way out of that, and he has to want to do it too. I have a lot of empathy for your plight, I've been there. I wish you a smooth path where you find the right therapist so your son can grow and heal and you can find peace of mind. (((((HUGS)))))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 545820, member: 13542"] HI JillS, I'm sorry, I know how hard it is. I hope you can find a good therapist to help your son with his abandonment issues. My difficult child, a full grown woman, had similar issues with her Dad who was never there for her. She seems to have created a life with abandonment at the core, everyone abandons her, and when all is said and done, from her perspective, so did I. She doesn't seem interested in therapy or helping herself, so after many years of trying to get her help, I set her up with all the therapists, social workers, social services help she could possibly get, but I'm not sure she will avail herself to that help. It is very sad. There is nothing more I can do, I had to let go. Right now your son is safe, perhaps he will go to the therapist and get some clarity and insight and be able to move through this while you get a break. He doesn't sound like a bad kid, he has a conscience, he feels bad about stealing, he just seems lost. I understand the guilt you feel about his Dad, I had a tough time with that too, but we didn't create that lack of connection. Your son has to find his own way out of that, and he has to want to do it too. I have a lot of empathy for your plight, I've been there. I wish you a smooth path where you find the right therapist so your son can grow and heal and you can find peace of mind. (((((HUGS))))) [/QUOTE]
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So I finally kicked him out - why do I feel like ****?
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