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so i'm nasty.....?
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 121132" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p>Jennifer, I think it's really great that your boyfriend pointed this out to you.</p><p> </p><p>As parents, especially parents of difficult child's, our emotional and physical stamina is drained very quickly. Sleeping is supposed to recharge our batteries, though most of us do not get enough sleep and we need to wake up a bit before facing our family (who is constantly pulling us in different directions). </p><p> </p><p>I am similar to wintersgrace - DO NOT WAKE ME UP UNLESS SOMEONE IS BLEEDING, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE, FLOODED OR ITS ROOF IS MISSING. Seriously, I hate everyone until about 10AM and I've had at least 2 large cups of coffee. If my H hears me stirring on a weekday morning, he makes a quick exit because, no lie, when I enter the kitchen I will most definitely be biting my tongue about something stupid like he left the bathroom in puddles, didn't wipe down the counter, made bad coffee, difficult child never came home....something. </p><p> </p><p>When my girlys were little, they'd come in my room and snuggle with us, and that was fine, as long as it was morning. If it was around 2Am, I will admit I probably was not very patient or nice. At that hour, I'd rather go sleep in their bed until they drifted off again, then go back to my bed. </p><p> </p><p>The rule is no one is allowed in our room unless we're in it too. My mother had the same rule so I guess it just felt normal to me. I don't like people in my things or space.</p><p> </p><p>Since your boyfriend has raised your awareness, perhaps you can think about it and try to regulate your responses a bit. I personally see nothing wrong with becoming angry at your 15y/o for waking you to ask for money that he/she could have asked for the night before. The little ones, however, I think should get a little more leeway.</p><p> </p><p>How you respond to them really does have an impact on their entire day, believe it or not. I know that if H and I spat in the mornings, the rest of my day feels a bit like a drag. And he said the same thing - it ruins his day when he leaves for work after we've argued.</p><p> </p><p>But don't beat yourself up over this, but do reflect on it and perhaps make a little list of rules that you simply must have them abide by so there will be less opportunity to an angry mom in the morning. For instance, tell 15 y/o that if money isn't asked for the night before, he misses out. He CANNOT wake you for this. Tell the little ones that they can come in to see you but they have to be real quiet or play in their rooms or read for 15 minutes beforehand. That way you'll likely wake up hearing them play, but you'll have the 15 minutes to 'wake up' a bit before they come into your room.</p><p> </p><p>I used to leave the cereal, bowls and spoons on the kitchen table Friday and Saturday nights so that the girls could get up in the morning, make themselves some cereal and watch morning cartoonss, thus allowing me at least another hour of peaceful sleep on the weekends. It really worked!!</p><p> </p><p>Good luck~</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 121132, member: 2211"] Jennifer, I think it's really great that your boyfriend pointed this out to you. As parents, especially parents of difficult child's, our emotional and physical stamina is drained very quickly. Sleeping is supposed to recharge our batteries, though most of us do not get enough sleep and we need to wake up a bit before facing our family (who is constantly pulling us in different directions). I am similar to wintersgrace - DO NOT WAKE ME UP UNLESS SOMEONE IS BLEEDING, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE, FLOODED OR ITS ROOF IS MISSING. Seriously, I hate everyone until about 10AM and I've had at least 2 large cups of coffee. If my H hears me stirring on a weekday morning, he makes a quick exit because, no lie, when I enter the kitchen I will most definitely be biting my tongue about something stupid like he left the bathroom in puddles, didn't wipe down the counter, made bad coffee, difficult child never came home....something. When my girlys were little, they'd come in my room and snuggle with us, and that was fine, as long as it was morning. If it was around 2Am, I will admit I probably was not very patient or nice. At that hour, I'd rather go sleep in their bed until they drifted off again, then go back to my bed. The rule is no one is allowed in our room unless we're in it too. My mother had the same rule so I guess it just felt normal to me. I don't like people in my things or space. Since your boyfriend has raised your awareness, perhaps you can think about it and try to regulate your responses a bit. I personally see nothing wrong with becoming angry at your 15y/o for waking you to ask for money that he/she could have asked for the night before. The little ones, however, I think should get a little more leeway. How you respond to them really does have an impact on their entire day, believe it or not. I know that if H and I spat in the mornings, the rest of my day feels a bit like a drag. And he said the same thing - it ruins his day when he leaves for work after we've argued. But don't beat yourself up over this, but do reflect on it and perhaps make a little list of rules that you simply must have them abide by so there will be less opportunity to an angry mom in the morning. For instance, tell 15 y/o that if money isn't asked for the night before, he misses out. He CANNOT wake you for this. Tell the little ones that they can come in to see you but they have to be real quiet or play in their rooms or read for 15 minutes beforehand. That way you'll likely wake up hearing them play, but you'll have the 15 minutes to 'wake up' a bit before they come into your room. I used to leave the cereal, bowls and spoons on the kitchen table Friday and Saturday nights so that the girls could get up in the morning, make themselves some cereal and watch morning cartoonss, thus allowing me at least another hour of peaceful sleep on the weekends. It really worked!! Good luck~ [/QUOTE]
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