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General Parenting
So many conflicting messages about discipline...help with defiant 3 y.o!
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<blockquote data-quote="hope9" data-source="post: 606950" data-attributes="member: 16628"><p>Hello TeDo...thank you for this thoughtful response. I have much respect for you raising twin boys on your own! I think you're right about probing. As my kids get a little more verbal, I'm trying to ask them more about their feelings and reactions to things- without judging it. Sometimes it's so hard because we know they have to do certain things even if they don't want to - like go to school. But I know that giving them a chance to air their feelings about it is still helpful. </p><p>One thing that's challenging about my son is that I think most of his resistance to doing things comes from HATING transitions, and not wanting to stop his play activities. He doesn't have many sensitivities except sound I think, so usually it's not so much the way the stroller feels or the way it feels to have diaper changed, but the transition. Also not having control over the situation. He is definitely a control freak....so it's hard to figure out how to help him because transitions happen all day long, and he can't be in control of everything because it's not safe (some examples of things he wants to control: closing the car doors, buckling himself into his car seat, putting a glass cup in the sink after he has grabbed it off the counter (he's 3 so he can't reach into the sink), and often he is desperate to walk across the street without hands....you get the idea, lots of things that have the potential for injury or big mess!). </p><p>This conversation is helping me tremendously, I'd love more feedback!</p><p>Thanks!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hope9, post: 606950, member: 16628"] Hello TeDo...thank you for this thoughtful response. I have much respect for you raising twin boys on your own! I think you're right about probing. As my kids get a little more verbal, I'm trying to ask them more about their feelings and reactions to things- without judging it. Sometimes it's so hard because we know they have to do certain things even if they don't want to - like go to school. But I know that giving them a chance to air their feelings about it is still helpful. One thing that's challenging about my son is that I think most of his resistance to doing things comes from HATING transitions, and not wanting to stop his play activities. He doesn't have many sensitivities except sound I think, so usually it's not so much the way the stroller feels or the way it feels to have diaper changed, but the transition. Also not having control over the situation. He is definitely a control freak....so it's hard to figure out how to help him because transitions happen all day long, and he can't be in control of everything because it's not safe (some examples of things he wants to control: closing the car doors, buckling himself into his car seat, putting a glass cup in the sink after he has grabbed it off the counter (he's 3 so he can't reach into the sink), and often he is desperate to walk across the street without hands....you get the idea, lots of things that have the potential for injury or big mess!). This conversation is helping me tremendously, I'd love more feedback! Thanks! [/QUOTE]
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So many conflicting messages about discipline...help with defiant 3 y.o!
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