B
Bunny
Guest
This morning the easy child, difficult child, and I spent some time putting together the gingerbread houses and trees from the kits that I bought. After they were done, they both went off the play, then came down for lunch. A little while later difficult child comes down and says to me, "I'm sorry for anything that I did today, oh wise and loving mother wh loves us all the best." I'm being buttered up for something so I ask him what he wants. He wants me to take him to the toy store. I tell him no. It's three weeks before Christmas and he should not be buying anything now. "But, what I want to buy is something that I didn't even ask anyone for!" husband and I both tell him no. So he asks if he can call Gram (mother in law) and ask her if she'll take him. Again, I told him no, that we said he can't go to the toy store. Then he starts in with "This is when I think you don't love me!" and "You're tearing apart everything that about our relationship that we've worked on building in the last few weeks! You're doing it, Mom. Not me!" Again, he is told no.
That starts the scraming tantrum. husband tells him to go to his room and cool off and he refuses. He looks at husband and says, "What? Are you going to make me? What are you going to do about it?" husband took him under his arms and I took his feet and we carried him to his room and told him to stay there. A few minutes later he came down and asked if he could go in the backyard. husband told him that he could. Next thing we know, he has his pillow, Beyblades, laptop and his bag full of stuff in his red wagon and is pulling the wagon across the yard towards the gate. We go out the front (where he is stunned to see us watching him) and I ask him where he thinks he's going. He says that he wants to calm down. I told him that was fine. If he wanted to calm down, then calm down, but I told him he had better not leave that yard or there will be consequences. He's standing by the end of the driveway and my neighbor across the street sees him and asks him what he's doing. The neighbor comes to talk to him and gets him to sit on the front porch and it trying to tell him that he's really lucky to have the parents that he has. There is a roof over his head and clothes on his back and food on his table. difficult child's response was that he didn't care.
I'm not sure what the neighbor said to him, but now he pulled his wagon back to the back yard and put everything in the shed, where he is sitting and sulking now. He can stay out there all he wants. At least I know where he is.
This is nonsense that I hate. When he doesn't get his way is when the whole, "No one loves me" card comes out (can we say manipulation?). I've told this to the therapist, but he doesn't see that part. "He needs to feel safe" the therapist says. So, going to the toy store is what he needs to feel safe? Give me a break!!
That starts the scraming tantrum. husband tells him to go to his room and cool off and he refuses. He looks at husband and says, "What? Are you going to make me? What are you going to do about it?" husband took him under his arms and I took his feet and we carried him to his room and told him to stay there. A few minutes later he came down and asked if he could go in the backyard. husband told him that he could. Next thing we know, he has his pillow, Beyblades, laptop and his bag full of stuff in his red wagon and is pulling the wagon across the yard towards the gate. We go out the front (where he is stunned to see us watching him) and I ask him where he thinks he's going. He says that he wants to calm down. I told him that was fine. If he wanted to calm down, then calm down, but I told him he had better not leave that yard or there will be consequences. He's standing by the end of the driveway and my neighbor across the street sees him and asks him what he's doing. The neighbor comes to talk to him and gets him to sit on the front porch and it trying to tell him that he's really lucky to have the parents that he has. There is a roof over his head and clothes on his back and food on his table. difficult child's response was that he didn't care.
I'm not sure what the neighbor said to him, but now he pulled his wagon back to the back yard and put everything in the shed, where he is sitting and sulking now. He can stay out there all he wants. At least I know where he is.
This is nonsense that I hate. When he doesn't get his way is when the whole, "No one loves me" card comes out (can we say manipulation?). I've told this to the therapist, but he doesn't see that part. "He needs to feel safe" the therapist says. So, going to the toy store is what he needs to feel safe? Give me a break!!
