So ready for a break I am laughing

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by mrscatinthehat, Dec 17, 2007.

  1. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    at things I shouldn't laugh at.

    difficult child 2 bit a staff member at Residential Treatment Center (RTC). Now in no is this funny however after asking if they were pressing charges (this is something we discussed today at the staffing that needed to start happening) we were told they hadn't yet but that the staff member was a bit upset as this was a second time in a week he had been bitten. I got off the phone and started to giggle. husband knew I had been on the phone with staff from gfg2s Residential Treatment Center (RTC) with what I had been saying. So he asked what was funny. I told him and for some reason it was contagious because I just wanted to know if this guy tastes like chicken or what. Can you tell it has been a long few days.

    Let us take a step back to recap these days. I posted about the evaluation with difficult child 2 being done so at the staffing today we did some discussing of what we are going to do now. Looks like we are going to start a paper trail (hence the charges when he does the violent stuff) so that when the time comes we have some ground work established to make decisions for the future. We are also going to work on a new therapist. He refuses to work with the one he has so we really have little option however since we had the evaluation we are going to let him know that they recommended we make some changes (which they did but we aren't going to be specific at this point as to what they are). He has little idea that we will be preparing for adult facilities/commitment. We decided as a group that it would be detrimental to tell him this early. Because one never knows if a miracle could happen.

    Also in talking to the one therapist I said one of my fears if he was released at 18 is the violence he might do to me and his biomom ( I know we are who he blames most for his predicament he is in though it was his behavior that landed him where he is) the therapist said yes and probably both sisters would be his other targets. I really wasn't sure that I should be afraid until she confirmed it. Not really what I wanted on top of everything else. I said if they let him go after all the work we do and he really isn't ready I move and not leave a forwarding address.

    We are going to continue to seek out what will be the best path for difficult child 2. This is going to be a very long journey. One hopes we have the stamina to go the long haul. We have many plans to ponder and it seems that everyone is on the same page which is scary and wonderful all at the same time.

    We are going to the christmas party on Thursday. We are also going to surprise him on the 26th and bring him home for a couple hours. I am looking at the house and I am terrified. I have to difficult child proof. I just hope we make it through the day when he is here.

    Yesterday we had a session with difficult child 1. She had a meltdown because I told her she needed to use her glasses while she was reading. We are talking major meltdown (throwing plates etc). She informed everyone she was going to her room and was not coming back out because of "my negativity". Well that was interesting. In the end she did come out of it but it was a bit sad that we revisited behavior from many moons ago. I am hoping that it is because of the holidays. At least that is what I am telling myself.

    difficult child 1 is coming home for a visit the 29th - 31st. This should be ok ( I am going to repeat that over and over until I believe it).

    We did get things fixed with the mistaken worker for difficult child 1. She is now going to be working on the transition things. So excited to get her on our page. But not sure when she is going to meet with us. Because we have been doing sessions on Sundays she just can't meet us then. And of course the Saturday we pick difficult child 1 up she isn't available and won't be there on the Monday the 31st because of the holiday then too. I realize that you know I am expecting a lot to know who is working with my daughter. So If we can't work it out (as in husband and I drive the three hours to meet her and then drive back on a weekday when difficult child 1 is in school) then we will have to wait until March at the next staffing. I am not liking that at all. But I will cross that bridge in January.

    Now to top it off I couldn't turn on my computer last night (must have been my negativity). So husband started running some diagnostics (bless his computer geek heart ) and found I had six Trojan Horse Virus'. I wanted to cry. But as you all can see I am back. husband worked his magic. Now if we could have a break.

    easy child is gone when the difficult children are here as none of the kids can be together at the same time yet. So she is wound up (what she usually does before going to her bio dads) and we are dealing with her ever changing moods because of that.

    I am wanting to run away after the first of the year just for a bit. I just have to find a safe refuge. Cuz the things I am finding funny are starting to be disturbing. Sorry for the long ramble.

  2. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I have a bit of an 'off' sense of humor, so I would have found it amusing, too. Especially after everything you've been through. You have to find the humor or you'll lose your mind. That staff worker must just taste good or something. Either that or he just needs to be quicker.

    You have a lot on your plate and it's not letting up anytime soon. I think running away after the first of the year is a great idea. You and husband need some definite couple time.
  3. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Oh god, Beth - I'm sorry, but I dying here. :rofl: Please forgive me - I know this scenario so very well between kt & wm.

    We've done this type of juggling so many times, it's not any wonder that the things you find funny are disturbing. Heck, they are disturbing & if you don't laugh you will lose your ever loving mind.

    Take a few deep breaths - get a difficult child proof safe for all of your valuables & the Irish whiskey you want on hand for when whatever difficult child leaves & you need the break. It's either that or ativan. :faint: :smile: Pick your poison.

    Holidays & difficult children don't mix; add in siblings who have been unsafe with one another in the past & it's an explosion waiting to happen.

    This is the first year we didn't try to FORCE a visit between tweedles dee & dum. This is the first year that we have true support behind a holiday visit with tdocs not only setting up the visit but preparing & serving our family lunch in a safe environment. In other words, not our home, but not an institutional environment either.

    Sweetie, check in often. Get a new laptop to lock up on that safe of yours; just in case your easy child decides to burp again. You're going to need the support over the next couple of weeks.

  4. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    husband and I would both have been laughing as well-sometimes if you don't laugh you cry. Hugs.
  5. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    Maybe the worker needs to use a different soap? Sounds like it is pretty yummy. Another one who chuckled. Don't they teach these people to keep their limbs out of mouth's range?

    I want to know how you do it. Your schedule is so full it is downright scary. Definitely find a way to get away after the holidays. You're going to need some recovery time.

    Hope everything goes reasonably well with the visits.
  6. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Sounds like this guy needs to wash his hands better after he's been to the Colonel (mmmmm, KFC!).

    We all laugh out of stress!


  7. Star*

    Star* call 911

    The last time I asked for a break out loud I heard on the TV:

    Gimme a break, gimme a break, break me off a piece of that KIT KAT BAR.

    As far as the laughing? You are aware that that is the beginning of your cheese totally slipping off your cracker aren't you? It's the body's way of trying to deal with stress. (NOT joking here)

    When Dude had his jaw broken back in January, and the doctor told us he had to cut near a nerve, and he could be mule lipped - Weleft in the car and my brain started going over all that was just told to me, surgery, nerve, wired shut, 8 weeks no food, scared for life, mule lipped, and I started laughing, and I was in the car, going down the road, husband was driving, and I was out of control laughing, I had tears, it sounded at one point like a barking seal - and husband contemplated pulling over and slapping me in the face - I was like that for 20 minutes straight NON STOP. It even freaked out Dude. Me too, but it was so dang funny.

    It's a scientific fact that if you are blue, or depressed and you try to laugh or force yourself to laugh you will feel better. Something like crying releases endorphines in our system from stress.

    Can you think about the old time cartoons when the crazy person is carted off? Usually laughing? -snap. Beth really take care of yourself during this time, find a way to have a moment of peace and relaxation and recharge your batteries. I'm worried about you -