Dixies_fire
Member
Tk and boyo went back to ex today. Tk to live, boyo for a few more weeks.
They were so good. Both of them. They were loving to each other and everyone else. They did not scream at each other, played together, played separately.
I am taking this hard because it means that ex has been able to accomplish something that I have not been able to do. Despite talking, consoling, time outs, yelling, crying in frustration.
During the last couple of months hubs and I decided that we have not been treating too fairly at all times because of the level of exhaustion her behavior has put us through. We have come down on her harshly sometimes overly harsh. At times she has told the truth when we believed her to be lying and found out differently later. And yes we apologized to her in those instances. We decided we weren't giving her a fair shake.
On top of army problems, money problems, hubs mental problems it has just been too much. I would start each day resolved to try to be better and at most we would get through the day with tk by the skin of our teeth each day some
Outlandish behavior derailed my resolve to try to bring joys to her life and not make ever day a trial, show more more love and acceptance and approval of my oldest child, more patience.
But this week she was wonderful and so loving.
And now she is gone.
By no means do I mean to say that all her problems were fixed she still was displaying the traits that I have identified at least in my own mind as her basic difficult child ness. Repeating questions asking questions she knows the answer to, textural issues having to be reminded to bathe with soap as opposed to just water, etc etc, You know the symptoms of not being completely neurotypical.
But over all she was a dream, which to me means she was incredibly unhappy here and I failed her and he isn't failing her.
I just don't know what to say.
They were so good. Both of them. They were loving to each other and everyone else. They did not scream at each other, played together, played separately.
I am taking this hard because it means that ex has been able to accomplish something that I have not been able to do. Despite talking, consoling, time outs, yelling, crying in frustration.
During the last couple of months hubs and I decided that we have not been treating too fairly at all times because of the level of exhaustion her behavior has put us through. We have come down on her harshly sometimes overly harsh. At times she has told the truth when we believed her to be lying and found out differently later. And yes we apologized to her in those instances. We decided we weren't giving her a fair shake.
On top of army problems, money problems, hubs mental problems it has just been too much. I would start each day resolved to try to be better and at most we would get through the day with tk by the skin of our teeth each day some
Outlandish behavior derailed my resolve to try to bring joys to her life and not make ever day a trial, show more more love and acceptance and approval of my oldest child, more patience.
But this week she was wonderful and so loving.
And now she is gone.
By no means do I mean to say that all her problems were fixed she still was displaying the traits that I have identified at least in my own mind as her basic difficult child ness. Repeating questions asking questions she knows the answer to, textural issues having to be reminded to bathe with soap as opposed to just water, etc etc, You know the symptoms of not being completely neurotypical.
But over all she was a dream, which to me means she was incredibly unhappy here and I failed her and he isn't failing her.
I just don't know what to say.
