mrscatinthehat
Seussical
Went to see the difficult children. Something we try to do efvery month. Got to gfg2s residence and had pizza with him during our two hour visit. We played cards and had a general good time.
As for difficult child 1 yesterday she had quite a day with cutting and a hospital trip. So as we were on the drive this morning we got a call from her telling us she wasn't wanting us to come. We said oh sorry but we are on our way so we are coming.
When we got to her house she was out on the porch hands on hips ready to pounce. husband and I said hi and then we went inside with her. As we got to her room I said so I take it with the way you are acting you are waiting for anything to say to have a fit and make this a bad day. No she says I am not doing that. (I figured lets diffuse things right away. We talked about her food stealing and various other things for a bit and at one point she said all dramatic like that she didn't want to talk about this stuff. I said at that point do you want to be treated like an adult. She of course said yes and I said that means we have to be able to talk about this stuff like adults.
so things went on and we discussed menus and what not. Then I took husband outside her room to have a chat with him. One of the big issues is the boyfriend that she has. We had not met him and we had some limits as to how often she could see him.
I asked her if she would like to invite said boyfriend to dinner. She was exstatic. (to my way of thinking might as well meet him so I know what we are dealing with and how to prepare myself for the inevitable.)
Everything got arranged and we picked him up at his place of residence (he is in a home like hers). He was very polite and made quite a good impression.
So as dinner started I started to interrogate (I mean casually get to know him). He was very forthcomeing with his answers. The bs detector didn't sense any. So either he is a very good actor or he isn't a bad guy so far. Then we got in the car and on our way back I asked him the burning question of why he was in the place he was (I mean if difficult child is going to have a difficult child boyfriend I would like to have a heads up on what is out there to happen). I braced not knowing how he would react to my question. Again he was very forthcoming.
Over the course of dinner there was some teasing and the like of difficult child 1 but nothing extreme. All in all it was great. Certainly not what I had mentally planned for.
So when we took her back she was in a great mood. We left to have our 3 hour drive home.
We get the phone call about 2 hours in that she freaked out about an hour after we left. We reviewed with the coordinater of the house what all happened. She let us know what staff said. None of us could lay a finger on why this happened. She cut and then ran from the home.
The only thing we can think is that she really was planning on a blow out with us over the stuff that had been happening and yesterday's lovely events and she just didn't know how to handle something going well. We tried so hard. And I'll be buggered if she didn't go and make it ugly in the end anyway.
The boyfriend was ok and seems to have been working hard to get his act together. Ah well.
Another day in the life.......
beth
As for difficult child 1 yesterday she had quite a day with cutting and a hospital trip. So as we were on the drive this morning we got a call from her telling us she wasn't wanting us to come. We said oh sorry but we are on our way so we are coming.
When we got to her house she was out on the porch hands on hips ready to pounce. husband and I said hi and then we went inside with her. As we got to her room I said so I take it with the way you are acting you are waiting for anything to say to have a fit and make this a bad day. No she says I am not doing that. (I figured lets diffuse things right away. We talked about her food stealing and various other things for a bit and at one point she said all dramatic like that she didn't want to talk about this stuff. I said at that point do you want to be treated like an adult. She of course said yes and I said that means we have to be able to talk about this stuff like adults.
so things went on and we discussed menus and what not. Then I took husband outside her room to have a chat with him. One of the big issues is the boyfriend that she has. We had not met him and we had some limits as to how often she could see him.
I asked her if she would like to invite said boyfriend to dinner. She was exstatic. (to my way of thinking might as well meet him so I know what we are dealing with and how to prepare myself for the inevitable.)
Everything got arranged and we picked him up at his place of residence (he is in a home like hers). He was very polite and made quite a good impression.
So as dinner started I started to interrogate (I mean casually get to know him). He was very forthcomeing with his answers. The bs detector didn't sense any. So either he is a very good actor or he isn't a bad guy so far. Then we got in the car and on our way back I asked him the burning question of why he was in the place he was (I mean if difficult child is going to have a difficult child boyfriend I would like to have a heads up on what is out there to happen). I braced not knowing how he would react to my question. Again he was very forthcoming.
Over the course of dinner there was some teasing and the like of difficult child 1 but nothing extreme. All in all it was great. Certainly not what I had mentally planned for.
So when we took her back she was in a great mood. We left to have our 3 hour drive home.
We get the phone call about 2 hours in that she freaked out about an hour after we left. We reviewed with the coordinater of the house what all happened. She let us know what staff said. None of us could lay a finger on why this happened. She cut and then ran from the home.
The only thing we can think is that she really was planning on a blow out with us over the stuff that had been happening and yesterday's lovely events and she just didn't know how to handle something going well. We tried so hard. And I'll be buggered if she didn't go and make it ugly in the end anyway.
The boyfriend was ok and seems to have been working hard to get his act together. Ah well.
Another day in the life.......
beth