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So very mad!
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 584943" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Tia</p><p></p><p>Bored is not an excuse to help yourself to someone else's money to buy yourself computers and the like. That is a HUGE deal. </p><p></p><p>That said? When Travis had that teacher abusing him in 5th grade.........I had no clue until the end of the year. I'd taken away nearly the kid's entire means of entertainment. Seriously. He was down to sitting on his bed with a book. When I discovered the so called "issues" we'd been dealing with all year were actually actively being caused by his teacher......... I of course blew. </p><p></p><p>But it also changed my view on school forever. There were no more homework wars. He would pass/fail by his own doing. I refused to get involved unless he asked me. Teachers had issues?? Teachers had to deal with it. I saw to it he got there. Period. I refused to punish for school behavior. I had more than enough to deal with for at home behavior to begin with. And honestly? School was such an ordeal for the kid to get through each day the <strong>last thing</strong> he needed was parents harping on him about homework and something that took place at school. Travis needed a safe haven. I gave it to him. It was his home. I took a huge risk he'd flunk out. It was a risk worth taking because nothing was working. Not the school's ideas, not mine, not punishment, not rewards. </p><p></p><p>The safe haven worked, though. He got to come home and relax and unwind. He didn't fail. He did better. Teachers weren't thrilled with me because they had to find their own solutions to issues. Well, honestly that made sense. They were with him during the day, not me. They figured it out. He dealt with natural consequences as they came along. But he was a far more relaxed and happy kid. </p><p></p><p>You know your difficult child. Only you could guess if something like this might help him. And might prevent something like this happening in the future. I do understand the whole "hasn't got a clue about personal boundaries" thing (the stealing ect) because Travis was awful with it for years (not money but other stuff). So if you think that is what was going on, then find some adequate natural consequences of your own to make him stop and think before he floats across that boundary again. </p><p></p><p>((hugs))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 584943, member: 84"] Tia Bored is not an excuse to help yourself to someone else's money to buy yourself computers and the like. That is a HUGE deal. That said? When Travis had that teacher abusing him in 5th grade.........I had no clue until the end of the year. I'd taken away nearly the kid's entire means of entertainment. Seriously. He was down to sitting on his bed with a book. When I discovered the so called "issues" we'd been dealing with all year were actually actively being caused by his teacher......... I of course blew. But it also changed my view on school forever. There were no more homework wars. He would pass/fail by his own doing. I refused to get involved unless he asked me. Teachers had issues?? Teachers had to deal with it. I saw to it he got there. Period. I refused to punish for school behavior. I had more than enough to deal with for at home behavior to begin with. And honestly? School was such an ordeal for the kid to get through each day the [B]last thing[/B] he needed was parents harping on him about homework and something that took place at school. Travis needed a safe haven. I gave it to him. It was his home. I took a huge risk he'd flunk out. It was a risk worth taking because nothing was working. Not the school's ideas, not mine, not punishment, not rewards. The safe haven worked, though. He got to come home and relax and unwind. He didn't fail. He did better. Teachers weren't thrilled with me because they had to find their own solutions to issues. Well, honestly that made sense. They were with him during the day, not me. They figured it out. He dealt with natural consequences as they came along. But he was a far more relaxed and happy kid. You know your difficult child. Only you could guess if something like this might help him. And might prevent something like this happening in the future. I do understand the whole "hasn't got a clue about personal boundaries" thing (the stealing ect) because Travis was awful with it for years (not money but other stuff). So if you think that is what was going on, then find some adequate natural consequences of your own to make him stop and think before he floats across that boundary again. ((hugs)) [/QUOTE]
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